Bird’s Eye View by Turkey Vulture

by Turkey Vulture, September 8, 2011

Greetings one and all. If you’re sitting comfortably then I shall begin. Can I say, with some emphasis, that every event/fundraiser at the Senior Center is for people of ALL AGES! This includes the twice-weekly lunches and dinners. If I had a dollar for every time I heard someone say that they thought the Senior Center events were for seniors only, I would own a winery by now!

The-Talk-of-the-Town is still the proposed Medical Marijuana Dispensary in the heart of Boonville, in-between Lauren’s Restaurant and the Live Oak Building, where The Valley Bible Fellowship group meets. Various public meetings are in the works to discuss this issue, starting with one last night at Lauren’s, for which the new dispensary ‘managers’ have distributed a very interesting flyer informing the reader that the owners will be present to discuss the new business and answer concerned citizens’ questions. It continues to be a very contentious topic but I can confirm that there is no truth to the rumor that, in an effort to placate the disgruntled neighbors, the new proprietors have offered enticing discounts on medical marijuana, t-shirts, and paraphernalia to all members of the Valley Bible Fellowship, providing of course that the Fellowship members can produce valid prescriptions from a doctor. I can also inform those readers who are unaware that the name of this establishment is ‘Mendocino Generations,’ a name chosen by the owners in a narrow decision over both ‘Budville’ and ‘The Anderstoned Valley Alternative Health Ctr.’ Wise decision.

A final comment on this issue for now is that information has reached me of a mildly upset group of passionate marijuana smokers who are planning to arrange a planning meeting to make plans to announce plans to hold a public meeting to protest the ‘bogus and totally uncool’ Bible Fellowship meetings in downtown Boonville. They point out that these biblical gatherings, which attract people with quite strong religious beliefs, who sometimes hang around outside the building blatantly brandishing bibles in their hands, are held at a venue that is not only right across the street from our County Fair but also next-door-but-one to Lauren’s family restaurant where impressionable children often enjoy lunch on Sundays.

This promises to be an interesting few weeks and my advice for what it's worth is to “smile, but be serious” and let's all try to get along. After all, it is the Bible – Leviticus, Chapter 19, Verse 18, to be precise, which clearly states “Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.” And that’s your Quote of the Week!

While I am spreading the love, how about something positive in this often-critical newspaper about our local public radio station – the much maligned, yet not always justifiably, KZYX? Having instructed my Local Media Correspondent, Bald Eagle, to do some research, he has come up with the fact that the current regime, under the guidance of Station Manager John Coate, has brought the station’s debt down from over $200K to less than $50K in two years. I’m sure the curmudgeons among you will have something negative to say about this somehow, or just have the usual complaints about the station and some of its programmers, some of which comments I have been known to share, but how about giving them their due on this? Well done to one and all, I say, keep it up. We need our local radio!

Public Service Announcements. #131: This week’s Boonville Farmer’s Market gathering in the parking lot at The Boonville Hotel will feature all the usual goodies, plus music from The Hubbert’s, Leslie and Michael. It’s all happening between 9.30am and noon. #132: From 11am to 4pm on Sunday September 11th it’s Heirloom Tomato Tasting Day at Handley Cellars Winery on Hwy 128 between Philo and Navarro. #133. Also on Sunday 11th, it’s the weekly oysters, champagne and sangria social at the Hotel from 4:30pm until the oysters are gone. Now that’s a splendid way to spend a Sunday. #134: It’s the second Tuesday of the month on Sept 13th and that means Dinner and Bingo Night at the Senior Center — good food, beer and wine, top quality bingo with prizes, and, as you may have read somewhere, you don’t have to be a senior to attend! So I urge you to come along and support this event. Remember, all proceeds go to our Senior/Community Center. And finally, #135: County Fair time in Boonville is just around the corner — Sept 16th-18th.

Now topics from The Three-Dot Lounge. Yes, “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley.

…From our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, comes another in his insightful series: ‘Forget The Rapture and worry about The Approach of the Apocalypse.’ Buzzard reports, “The state of dress at the high school is certainly a sign of our declining standards as a nation and the effect of the mass media, in all its forms, on our young people’s sheep-like tendencies. Although the high school administration is making some progress in their efforts to enforce the new dress code, this well-intended move is apparently not easy to put into effect and many of the kids continue to dress as if they are at Club Med rather than at a high school. I cannot help but think that it would be far less of a problem if the kids were sent home immediately if not dressed appropriately, and it would certainly help if the parents stepped up and played their part in imposing this too.” I couldn’t agree more, Buzzard. And can someone please remind me again of the argument against school uniforms?

…Having heard that from The Old Buzzard, I would like to just add that one hopes the teachers and staff are also appropriately dressed. Flip-flops and beachwear are surely off limits to one and all — one hopes.

…Another regular stopped by over the weekend and informed me that the Food Shed Gang, those kings and queens of the local pot luck, had met last week to eat, drink, and be merry in their own way at their quarterly gathering, held at The General Store in Boonville. One item discussed was The ‘Not-so-Simple’ Living Fair held a month or so ago, in which this group played a large part. Apart from the kudos that permeated the room, in many cases very deservedly so, it appears that the group is considering a new name, if indeed they decide to go ahead and do another event next year, and the rumor is that my suggestion of ‘The Complicated Living Fair’ is being considered. I should add that another rumor, one that says Corporal Raindrop arrived for the pot luck with two sticks of celery and a piece of bread, is completely unfounded.

Oh, dear, have I upset somebody? Surely not. I kid the Corporal, er Captain. I’m outtahere. But before I go, let’s not forget that the hot weather is still with us so please remember to keep your windows cracked if you have pets in your vehicle; children too I suppose.

Otherwise, Keep the Faith; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you.

One final request, “Let us prey.”

Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture.

PS. Contact me with words of support/abuse through the Letters or at turkeyvulture1@earthlink.net.

PPS. On the sheep, Grace.

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