Bird’s Eye View (Nov. 29, 2017)
by Turkey Vulture, November 29, 2017
Public Service Announcements:
#544. The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital will visit the Valley Thursday, December 14 from 2-4pm.
#545. The monthly Barn Sale returns this coming Saturday/Sunday, December 2/3 from 10am-3pm at The Big Barn next to the St. Elizabeth Seton Catholic Church Refectory on AV Way, just north of Boonville. plenty of bargain Xmas gift possibilities available.
#546. The AV Museum is open every Saturday and Sunday from 1-4pm in The Little Red Schoolhouse next to the Elementary School on AV Way, a perfect way tro spend a weekend afternoon. “The Best Little Museum in the West.”
#547. The Unity Club’s AV Lending Library at The Fairgrounds is open Tuesday 1.30-4.30pm and Saturday 2-4pm.
#548. And the Unity Club’s annual Holiday Bazaar is Saturday, December 9 at the Apple Hall in Boonville from 10am-4pm. Christmas gifts and food, raffle, snack bar, and my personal favorite, photographs with Santa Claus, who, let me assure you, is neither myself nor a thinly-disguised AVA Supremo Bruce Anderson despite vicious rumors to the contrary.
Here is the menu for the Community lunches next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors and charges $7 for Non-seniors. Tomorrow, Thursday, November 30, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Chicken "Bleu" Casserole with Chocolate Kahlua Cake for dessert. Next Tuesday, December 5, the lunch features Meatloaf, Mashed potatoes and gravy, followed by Wendy’s Chocolate Oatmeal Bars. Includes vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal! On Thursdays the Center offers a Diabetes Workshop in English from 1-3pm and in Spanish from 5.30-7.30pm hosted by the AV Health Center; to register call 895-3477. Meanwhile, on Tuesday and Thursday at 9am the Center offers ‘Young at Heart Exercise’ with Linda Boudoures. Thursdays at 9am it’s the Water Color Painting Group, with Kathy’s Easy-stretch Yoga class at 11am. The Senior Center Community Bus goes to Ukiah on Mondays, and to Santa Rosa on the first Wednesday of the month. Sign up early: 489-1175.
From The Three-Dot Lounge, it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley.
…Thanksgiving is arguably the best holiday in this country.
… All citizens should get tags (or chips) for their pets. It’s easy and cheap at www.tagxpress.com and all those hard working volunteers at the Animal Rescue, plus the many other animal lovers in The Valley, will certainly appreciate it.
… All attendees at Pot Lucks in The Valley must bring a dish or alcohol large enough to feed or quench the thirst of at least eight guests. A stick of celery, day-old bread, two beers will no longer suffice.
... No more ego-vineyards are allowed. Particularly if it is to be owned by: 1) a wine-guzzling know-all who assumes they can make wine just because he/she has made their millions in an entirely different field of expertise; 2) someone living in some far flung location and has never lived here; and 3) people who wouldn’t know a wild hog if it bit them in the ass or a Turkey Vulture if it defecated on their head.
… Anyone, anywhere in public, starting a sentence with “You should” will be fined $1 on the spot. All monies going towards the Save the Turkey Vulture Fund.
I’m outta here. I’ve got see a man about a sheep. So, be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets, they will be faithful and true to you to the last beat of their hearts; think good thoughts; ‘Keep the Faith’; try to not let life get in the way of living; may your god go with you, and may your dog go with you too. A final request, “Let us prey.” Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture. Contact me through the Letters Page or at firstname.lastname@example.org.
PS. Hi, George: hope you and Sheila are well. Is that ‘lafter’ I hear, Carroll? Bobwhite Quail: keep up the knitting!