I Harmonize With Your Spam

by Tim Stelloh, January 15, 2010

Much of the spam we receive here at theAVA.com is of the fake comment variety--that is, posts disguised as comments arrive in my inbox that say something like: "Man; this is really the best post in the world guys.. I'll make sure to link to it on my blog!!!!"

The third-grade grammar usually gives 'em away--but embedded somewhere in there is the target for the Mark, the websites where said spammers are hoping you'll while away your days:  heelsncleavage.com, bestpantyhoseontheplanet.net, flatratesexallday.info, etc.

This is the tedious, no-fun-at-all stuff--the stuff that's impossible to miss unless, well, you're this guy.

Then a different strain began arriving in my inbox. They're still the fake comment variety--and they have the familiar, off-kilter phrasing of a Nigerian bank scam. But instead of convincing me with exclamation points, they're doing it with an English dictionary, purple-to-the-enth flattery and a control of language that rivals someone with Tourette's.

As someone who writes for a living, I find myself supremely, unequivocally--nay, thirstily--convinced. I'll buy your pantyhose!!!!!!!

Behold:

conclusions and will thirstily look forward to your upcoming updates. Just saying
thanks will not just be adequate, for the tremendous lucidity in your writing. I
will immediately grab your rss feed to stay privy of any updates. De lightful work
and much success in your business dealings!Well, the article is really the best on this notable topic. I harmonise with your conclusions and will thirstily look forward to your upcoming updates. Just saying thanks will not just be adequate, for the tremendous lucidity in your writing. I will immediately grab your rss feed to stay privy of any updates. De-lightful work and much success in your business dealings!

Well, the article is really the best on this notable topic. I harmonise with your conclusions and will thirstily look forward to your upcoming updates. Just saying thanks will not just be adequate, for the tremendous lucidity in your writing. I will immediately grab your rss feed to stay privy of any updates. De-lightful work and much success in your business dealings!

No, much success to you johnjoseph147@ymail.com! And may you find tremendous lucidity in all of your business dealings!!!!

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