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End of Year Awards, 2022

WOMEN OF THE YEAR, with special grace under hugely unfair criticism: Michelle Hutchins, who lost re-election as County Superintendent of schools to a secret gang of "educators," past and present, who lied about her and misrepresented what were in fact major accomplishments in fair distribution of County educational monies; Chamise Cubbison, similarly attacked by a County administrative apparatus that left her to pick up the pieces from their blunders, all the while blaming Ms. Cubbison for their incompetence; Louise Simson, Superintendent of the Anderson Valley schools whose energetic intelligence has revitalized a school system gone torpid from Covid and fill-in administrators. 

DISAPPEARANCE OF THE YEAR: Ann Molgaard, latest victim of County's Stalinist personnel practices, employed Thursday, gone Friday, non-personed ever since. Runner-up: Former Supervisor John McCowen. The garrulous Ukiah solon suddenly went silent six months ago. Known to clean up after the homeless, they may have cleaned him up.

COCKEYED OPTIMISTS of the year: Democratic Party of Mendocino County, who think they and their party are the way forward. On the other hand, they might just be lonely, politics being an excuse to gather with other delusionals.

NUZZLEBUM of this year, any year: Scott Simon of NPR

STATEMENTS OF THE OBVIOUS, repeaters of received wisdom, perennial co-winners: David Brooks, NYT. Runner-up, Pete Golis, Santa Rosa Press Democrat.

BEST BOOKING PHOTO: 

Amica Wetzler

CLEARCUTTERS OF THE YEAR: PG&E for its random, unaccountable County wide tree massacres.

 MORE MEETINGS, LEAST PROGRESS AWARD: The self-cancelling Measure B Committee. (Any appointed committee in Mendocino County, home of more experts per capita than any county in the United States, is self-sabotage.)

BIGGEST BOONDOGGLE OF THE DECADE: New County Courthouse. Runner Up: Great Redwood Trail. Third Runner up: Supervisors Chambers remodel for over $400k complete with customized bullet proof glass.

SWEETHEART DEAL OF THE YEAR: Sacto Architects Nacht & Lewis who are allowed to write their own ticket for facility construction overhead and administration.

JOURNALO ROOKIE OF THE YEAR: Matt LaFever of website, Mendofever.

JOURNALO COMEBACK KID OF THE YEAR: Mike Geniella.

SUPERINTENDENT OF THE YEAR: Anderson Valley’s Louise Simson who single-handedly reinvigorated Anderson Valley schools and brought the community along with her.

R2D2-SPEAK: Supervisor Ted Williams, who routinely resorts to techno-bafflegab in lieu of mother tongue responses.

VALLEY OF THE DOLLS AWARD; County CEO's office, a legacy of departed CEO Carmel ‘You Talkin' To Me, Mr. Man?’ Angelo.

MOST INEFFECTUAL PUBLIC BODY: Mendocino County Board of Supervisors for ignoring the will of the voters on almost every local ballot measure, and for providing zero leadership as Mendocino County goes slowly broke while providing unsupervised blank checks to outside County contractors, especially lawyers and architects.

MOST MISSED PUBLIC OFFICIAL: Retired Fort Bragg Police Chief John Naulty.

MOST SUSPICIOUS PLEA DEAL in modern Mendocino County history: A dual project of DA David Eyster and Superior Court Judge Ann Moorman for former Ukiah police sergeant Kevin Murray, rapist, tweaker and gawd only knows what else.

PUFF THE DEAD DRAGON AWARD: Mendo’s Moribund Pot Permit Program which continues to limp along with more pot bureacrats than applicants with state licenses.

MARTYR OF THE YEAR: Noble Waidelich, former Ukiah Police chief summarily removed from his job on the dubious say-so of a former girlfriend and police gang girl, a matter leaving Waidelich in limbo for months now while the DA endlessly waffles on whether or not to prosecute him.

NOW YOU SEE HIM, NOW YOU DON'T AWARD: Former Mendo cop Trent James who disappeared after stirring up Mendo’s Blue Meanie brigades with on-line videos alleging widespread corruption before making a quixotic, failed write-in campaign for Sheriff.

BEST SUPERVISORIAL STATEMENT of the Year: Supervisor Dan Gjerde’s denunciation of the inland water mafia and their laughably unjustified demand for a taxpayer subsidy via a Countywide sales tax.

BEST ESSAY by a Public Official: Sheriff Kendall’s memoir of his father.

COCKEYED OPTIMIST OF THE YEAR II: John Redding for his kamikaze run as a Republican against incumbent Supervisor Ted Williams in the NPR-brained Fifth District where even Democrat female Wendy Roberts got branded as too right wing in her run against faux liberal Dan Hamburg.

BEST HIGH SCHOOL coach and athletic director, John Toohey of Anderson Valley High School.

BEST NEW LOCAL REPORTER: Terry Sites of the Anderson Valley Advertiser.

LOW-DOWNDEST POLITICAL CAMPAIGN IN LOCAL HISTORY: Nicole Glentzer, Mendocino County Office of Education, with big assists from the least competent sectors of Mendo's intellectually impaired edu-establishment, past and present.

SCAPEGOAT OF THE YEAR: Auditor-Controller-Treasurer-Tax Collector Chamise Cubbison who stepped up to run an understaffed consolidated department decimated by retirements and resignations only to be blamed for the County’s long-standing poor financial reporting.

LAWN GUY OF THE YEAR for keeping it green in the drought years: DA David Eyster.

BEST MENDO HISTORIANS: Brad Wiley, Katy Tahja, with matching appreciation for the Kelly House Museum in Mendocino, and Alyssa Ballard at the Held-Poage Library in Ukiah.

MOST WELCOME Post-Covid Revival: Unity Club/Wildflower Show at the Boonville Fairgrounds.

SPORTS HERO OF THE YEAR: Brock Purdy of the San Francisco Forty-Niners.

UNDER-RECOGNIZED MEDICAL MAN for his years of service to the Anderson Valley community, Dr. Mark Apfel.

MOST WELCOME ballot measure: School Bond passage for Boonville school repairs which, although the finances were of course mishandled by the County, promises to bring long-overdue upgrades to local school facilities.

PROFESSOR IRWIN COREY AWARD. County Counsel Christian Curtis, the highest paid public attorney per capita in California but the least articulate. First sentence clear, second sentence in the ballpark of meaning, third sentence and beyond a rhetorical Rorschach riddled with ums and uhs. 

MOST OVER-HYPED BALLOT MEASURE: Measure P which promises millions in new money for County fire departments but can still be snagged by the County if the Supervisors claim to be broke.

BEST MANAGED TOWN: Fort Bragg under "Gettin' It Done" mayor, Bernie Norvell and former mayor and long-time city council anchor, Lindy Peters.

BEST LAW ENFORCEMENT HIRE, Chief Neil Cervenka, Fort Bragg

MOST IMPRESSIVE crook catch, The Mendocino County Sheriff's Department's apprehension of Boonville armed robber just before he boarded a plane for his home country of Argentina. 

DHARMA BUM OF THE YEAR: Craig Stehr, presently of Ukiah, age 72, who has lived well for years but hasn't worked since his morning paper route as a 12-year-old. Contributions welcome at his PayPal account.

TOWN GREETER, the always helpful and watchful, Jose ‘Lumpy”’ Garcia, Boonville.

MOST EXCELLENT RESTAURANTS per capita in the United States, the Anderson Valley, Mendocino County, where it's impossible to get a bad meal.

COUP OF THE YEAR: The Skunk Train’s use of eminent domain to acquire Fort Bragg’s abandoned Georgia Pacific mill site at a fire sale price leading to an ongoing court battle about whether the Skunk Train is exempt from local development rules.

MARIE ANTOINETTE AWARD IN PERPETUITY goes to the wineries of the Anderson Valley for heedlessly, unapologetically, destroying the sleep of at least two thousand Valley residents every Spring for nights on end, their monarchical arrogance memorably expressed by Ted Bennett of the Navarro Winery when he told a room of critics, "My grapes are more important than your sleep."

DISAPPOINTMENTS OF THE YEAR: Anderson Valley's rednecks for not shooting winery frost fans.

LUCKIEST DRUNKEN OUTBACK IDIOT OF THE YEAR: Trevor Williams whose encounter with local cops back in July would have been lethal in most other places.

Trevor Williams

Williams fired a gun which he was prohibited from owning at a juvenile female on his huge north county ranch prompting a response from deputies. Upon arrival Williams unleashed a “hostile” verbal barrage at the cops, telling them to go back where they came from, slammed his gate and went back to his house where he proceeded to arm himself with “several” firearms including a high-powered scoped rifle. Deputies cleared the area and called for backup, preparing for a gunfight. Williams demanded to speak only to Sheriff Matt Kendall, Mendo’s go-to negotiator for drug-addled or drunk suspects, to “de-escalate” the situation. As they waited for the Sheriff, Williams gathered up more guns, more ammo and extra booze and loaded them onto his ATV. When backup arrived Williams became even “more verbally hostile.” From the Sheriff’s press release: “After approximately ten minutes of Williams yelling at the Sheriff's Office personnel on scene, Williams left his residence on his ATV and disappeared out into his 7,700-acre ranch.”

With considerable restraint, deputies held back, waiting for Sheriff Kendall to arrive. Deputies then spotted Williams “low-crawling through a creek bed in an attempt to flank the Sheriff's Office personnel on scene."

From the press release: “Once he was spotted, Williams stood up and it was determined he was armed with three handguns and a scoped high powered rifle. Williams took up a position of cover behind a piece of heavy machinery and began pointing his rifle in the direction of the Sheriff's Office personnel in what appeared to be an effort to acquire a target. Williams was verbally commanded to drop his rifle several times before he finally complied and placed the rifle down and put his hands up in an apparent [sic] gesture of surrender. Williams was then verbally commanded to come out of the field and walk towards the Deputies’ location with his hands up. Williams complied at first, but then turned around and walked away from the Deputies. A Deputy and a Sergeant then re-positioned themselves to intercept Williams as he again appeared to be trying to flank them. Williams was contacted by the Sergeant and Deputy and given verbal commands to keep his hands up as he was still armed with three handguns in his waistband. Williams complied and walked towards them with his hands up. Once he reached their position, an attempt to physically disarm Williams was conducted by the Sergeant on-scene. Williams grabbed the Sergeant’s hand as he tried to remove the handguns from Williams' waistband. Williams then grabbed one of the handguns from his waistband and also grabbed the Sergeant’s issued firearm. A struggle for control of the firearms between the Sergeant and Williams ensued which resulted in the Sergeant maintaining control of his firearm and Williams’ handgun. Williams continued to try to gain possession of the Sergeant’s firearm and maintain possession of his own handgun. Williams was pinned against a fence during the struggle which allowed the other Deputy to remove all the handguns from Williams waistband and his right hand.”

Williams was finally handcuffed, taken to the Willits Hospital and “medically cleared,” and then booked into the jail on $500k bail. Deputies subsequently searched his property and found “other firearms” which Williams illegally possessed. 

As of today, the case is still pending.

One Comment

  1. Bruno Ruhland January 5, 2023

    Damn. What utterly decent cops ! Good on them !

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