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Valley People (May 13, 2015)

LORETTA HOUCK remains in serious but stable condition at Santa Rosa Memorial Hospital after suffering a terrible injury to her head in an accident two weeks ago. You can help Loretta and her family with medical expenses at this on-line address:

NORTH FORK NAVARRO RIVER ROAD HIKE.  Saturday May 23rd  9:30 AM-12:30 PM  Join the Anderson Valley Land Trust and the Navarro River Resource Center for a walk along the North Fork Navarro River. The walk will be 3 to 4 miles round trip along a road adjacent to the North Fork Navarro, which is owned by Mendocino Redwood Company, and scheduled to be de-commissioned later this year. Linda MacElwee, from NRRC, and Kirk Vodopals, a Hydrologist with MRC will lead the walk. To RSVP and for more information about the starting point and carpooling please contact:  AVLT at or 707-895-3150  or NRRC at 707-895-3230

NAVARRO RESTORATION PLANNING — Updates and Opportunities

On Thursday, May 14th from 2:30 to 4pm at the AV Grange, the public is invited to learn more about collaborative planning in the Navarro watershed for controlling road-related sediment and improving stream conditions. Join agency staff and science professionals for an informal discussion regarding potential, upcoming stewardship opportunities for landowners/managers—featuring information provided by: North Coast Regional Water Quality control Board, Stillwater Sciences, Inc., Pacific Watershed Associates, The Nature Conservancy, Mendocino County Resource Conservation District (MCRCD). The planning process will analyze data and inventory roads towards the goals of improving water quality through voluntary restoration—future projects include road sediment reduction, riparian restoration, and summer base flow enhancement. The new revised Handbook for Forest, Ranch, and Rural Roads is available for free download at: Collaborative Planning in the Navarro is funded through a 319(h) Clean Water Act grant through the Mendocino County Resource Conservation District. Through collaborative planning, MCRCD will prioritize sub watersheds and road networks for restoration treatments. For further information, please call Patty Madigan at: 937-3082 or Linda MacElwee at: 895-3230

BRONWYN HANES was sentenced last Wednesday to another 60 days of County jail time to be served weekends beginning in July. Ms. Hanes has angered Judge Moorman for attempting to disguise her failure to make the regular, agreed upon restitution payments for the roughly $30,000 Ms. Hanes was convicted of embezzling from the Anderson Valley PTA. Last week, Judge Moorman threatened Ms. Hanes with state prison if Ms. Hanes made any further attempts to mislead the court.

UNSOLICITED PLUG: Chris Tompkins of Philo's essential service station, Northwest Tire & Oil. Wednesday's at your beloved community newspaper can be nerve wracking if any part of the day's delivery process is thrown off. The paper's got to be paid for and picked up at Healdsburg Printing by 9am, driven back to Boonville for labeling, bagging and delivery by ten, ready for total dispatch from the Boonville Post Office by four, with a last delivery stop at Ukiah's Mendocino Book Company. Lots or road time in one long day that can be thrown big time off if it doesn't go perfectly. A slow-mo flat tire on the editor's Honda Civic, 237,000 miles (and counting) of almost perfect durability, threatened to set us back big time. Chris saved us from that calamity. It took him a mere 20 minutes to break the tire completely down, find the nearly invisible nail that was causing the tire to deflate, plug the hole, remount the reborn Firestone, and we were back on the road, all for thirty bucks labor on a very warm day.

RIVER WATCH. Marshall Newman notes: "USGS needs to have someone check and recalibrate the Navarro River flow and height gages. A look at the Navarro River near Greenwood Bridge shows flows similar to those of early August in a normal rainfall year, but nothing like the readings the gage is giving. Also, no way that flow gage should have been rising a full week after the last rather modest rain — the Navarro doesn’t flow that way. Very suspicious. That last rain provided plenty of standing water for mosquitoes to propagate. Anyone heading into Big Hendy Grove should wear mosquito repellant — they are going to need it, and not just early or late in the day. Lots of wildlife at the upper and lower elevations looking for water. Less so in the middle elevations, where springs and watercourses are already mostly flowing underground."

A SLIGHT BOUQUET OF BOOMBA BOXXA. The Anderson Valley Red Eyes, sleepless after a second spring of vineyard frost fans, will be leafletting grape growers as they enter the Pinot Noir Festival Technical event on Friday, May 15th at 8:30am at the Fairgrounds.

BULLSHIT BLVD. Excuse me? That's the street sign leading to the only home thus designated off Ornbaun Road, a home where Fox News is never off…


TOMMY WAYNE KRAMER, by far the Northcoast's liveliest writer, laments the loss of civic authenticity in Sunday's Ukiah Daily Journal, assessing Boonville this way: “Or consider Boonville, once among the roughest of Mendocino county outposts. Boonville is now a purring kitten of post-yuppie devolution, infested with wine growers, wine merchants and wine drinkers. The triple whammy. It exists today as a stopover for out of town swells who want a croissant and latte before continuing on to the place they actually want to visit. Boonville will soon unfurl a banner across Highway 128: “Hick-Free Since 1987!” and is currently home to Rasta music festivals and wine, wine, wine. Being a distant, isolated hamlet is no longer protection from the insatiable Hawaiian shirt set, with attached wives in “fashionable” Banana Republic attire. Today you need a moat, alligators and armed guards. Spotting a live Boonville logger in corks and flannel shirt today would be as rare a sight as a glimpse of Bigfoot, and would probably draw a TV crew from LA.”

BOONVILLE is considerably blanded down from its days as a logging and ranching town, and certainly less vivid than the hippie years when the shaggy newcomers began settling in the hills, but despite the unique suburbanization of the place — it's now mostly well-to-do white people and an equivalently large population of immigrant Mexicans — Boonville remains an interesting place, but interesting in different ways.

COLLAGE FOR KIDS ages 8-12 (younger of accompanied by adult). Bring your scissors and glue sticks and let’s make art! Thursdays: May 21, 28, June 4. 3:15-4:15pm behind Philo Ridge tasting room, TomTown, Boonville. Sliding scale, $20-$25 per kid for three classes. Class size limit: 12. 895-2483 or email Cindy at (Instructors Via Keller and Susan Gross)

STARHAWKED! Our complaints that the forthcoming Not So Simple Living Fair had reverted to the stoned nuttiness of yesteryear in its selection of Starhawk as keynote speaker, Mary Aigner clarified: "KZYX is a sponsor of the Not So Simple Living Fair, but the station is not involved in a financial capacity. While we do provide on-air publicity, we don't determine who the speakers are nor do we negotiate their fees. That is the purview of the organizers of NSSLF. For your convenience, I've cc'd some of the principals there; perhaps they can give you that information. Rest assured, your hard earned membership dollars are not going to pay Starhawk's honorarium."

RYAN "RYANO" O'CORRIGAN then wrote to say that The Hawk was being paid a cool thou to take the Simple Livers deep, real deep, the weekend of July 24th.

IT'S TIME ONCE AGAIN for the annual migration of art from the Anderson Valley Elementary School to Lauren's restaurant in Boonville, for the month of May. Please buzz on by and take a gander at what we've been up to this past year at AV Elementary. — Chris Bing, part-time art instructor

IT’S TIME for the annual Anderson Valley Lions Club Memorial Day Weekend barbeque, Sunday, May 24, 4:30 to 7:30 PM at the Boonville Fairgrounds. This fun event is a fund raiser for the Anderson Valley Elder Home. There will be tri tip and barbeque chicken with all the fixings, plus beer, wine and non-alcoholic beverages as well. All your neighbors will be there, plus a silent auction for you to bid on local wine, art, services and other great items. Dance and sway to the happy rhythms of Pilar Duran and Polka Loca. Tickets are $18.00 at the door, $15.00 in advance and $12.00 for kids under 12 and seniors over 62. Children under 6 are free. Advance tickets available at All That Good Stuff in Boonville and Lemon’s Market in Philo.

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