I have seen the future of footgear, and its name is Hey Dude.
Despite the improbable brand label, Hey Dude shoes will soon sweep the country like hula hoops, Beanie Babies and Taylor Swift all rolled into one.
Hey Dudes are perfect for people A) with feet, and B) who need shoes that are cheap, comfy, and ugly.
But not as ugly as Crocs. Crocs are the cheesy rubber flip-flop sandals you wear to the shower, or maybe even working in the backyard if your backyard has a tall fence and no one can see your shoes. But then Crocs caught on and now people who ought to know better are wearing them in public. I’ve even seen ‘em in airports.
Hey Dudes sound like they’re hep, cool, and the groovy shoe for rock stars. They aren’t.
If you’ve seen my shabby shoes anytime in the last few months you will have assumed I’m hopeless, both financially and fashionably. They scream “CHEAP!” because they are,
Hey Dude shoes look like what people in nursing homes wear, or prison inmates. They’re soft, flexible, shapeless collapsed pieces of canvas stitched together as if trying to imitate a really bad set of boat shoes.
But still, they’re better than Crocs. I should know, and I do. I’ve been wearing Crocs for more than 10 years and dozens of pairs, and have thanked Mercury, the fleet-footed God of swift travel, many times for the Crocs footgear that gave an old guy a new life in ramblin’ along that ol’ lonesome highway to nowhere.
Because I was the first in Ukiah brave and bold enough to wear Crocs in public I always considered myself their de facto inventor. But I never said so out loud because I knew Crocs had actually been invented by Congressman George Santos.
But now it’s time to toss Crocs aside for these new and improved Hey Dude models, assuming you can find a set. Back in my tiny sliver of a demographic that makes up a fly-speck of the Carolinas, Hey Dudes have caught on bigly.
Too bad Rod Johnson abandoned the retail footgear business just in time to miss the Hey Dude shoe craze. He could have opened Rod’s Hey Dude Outlets all over California, and maybe even let me run a shop here in the south.
I’d have made so much money I could have bought a pair of Hoka shoes.
* * *
May Peak Oil Never Stop
Peak oil is among the favorite scare tactics of our often honest leftwing friends.
Peak Oil is coming, they tell us, just like they’ve told us many times in the past. Make that “many, many times in the past.”
In 1914 the U.S. Bureau of Mines said oil reserves in the USA would be gone by the year 1924.
In 1939 The U.S. Interior Department said the entire world’s oil reserves would run out in 13 years.
In 1951 the Interior Department said the world had just 13 years of oil reserves.
In 1970, world estimates were estimated at 612 billion barrels of proven reserves.
By 2006, after pumping out 767 billion barrels of oil, the proven reserves were at 1.2 trillion barrels, and growing.
This won’t stop or even slow lefty “scientists” who insist a combination of carbon buildup. arctic melting, ozone holes, cow flatulence and your neighbor’s pickup truck means we’ll all be getting monthly half-cup rations of oil in 13 years.
Look at our graph. Feel the science.
* * *
Stan Janiak, R.I.P.
Stan Janiak wasn’t feeling so good. He went to the doctor, took some tests, got the results and a few days later he died. To Stan it probably felt the time span was about as long as it took you to read that sentence.
No one saw it coming; how could we? The numb, hollow ache I’m feeling might have been diluted had the illness been extended and the pain drawn out. The shock might never have been.
He was truly a wonderful guy. A list of the half dozen nicest people I’ve ever known would include Stan Janiak and I don’t know who the other five might be. He was thoughtful, studious, funny and easy to hang with.
Stan was proudly Christian, quietly conservative and deeply concerned at the direction his country was headed. We took long walks through Ukiah neighborhoods and never parted without my having been impressed with his knowledge, insight, wit and kindness.
I miss Stan immensely, and the jagged hole in my heart is surely exacerbated by so abrupt a departure.
These are nice. Comfortable, cheap, nice enough to wear anywhere, and safe; they really stick to the floor. And they last for three or four years of daily use, as long as you change into work boots when work boots are called for, like for shoveling.
I see that they don’t come in sizes 11 and up anymore. That’s too bad. I had just got my latest pair of them, though, so I’m set until 2027 or 2028. You can get them in black-and-grey or brown-and-grey.
https://www.big5sportinggoods.com/store/details/denali-outback-mens-hiking-boots/5380132930056/_/A-6840391
Shoes – or rather boots – are a reoccurring nightmare for me. Large (13), wide (EE) flat feet and hard orthotics make finding a pair difficult. After my previous go-to boots were discontinued, I spent six months looking for other brands that fit. On the cheaper side, Hi-Tec Altitude VI proved okay. On the expensive side, Red Wing Rough Neck Heritage – with some caveats – work. For deck shoes, Timberlands. Nothing cheap, but durable.
I’ve had great success with wearing Hoka Hoka One running shoes all day on my feet with no fatigue nor pain. I run through at least 2 pairs a year, and keep the worn ones with less bounce, for all terrain use, as they become no longer as effective on cement and paved surface.
I say, ‘Buy the Hoka shoes, find the job.’
Hoka One parent company Dexter Shoes, supports former inmate reality film actor Markell Taylor’s air travel expenses stateside and internationally, to showcase prison incarceration reform, as highlighted by the San Quentin movie ‘26.2 to Life’ which preceded California Governor Newsom’s now ongoing multi million dollar conversion of San Quentin Prison to prisoner rehabilitation.