United States President Donald Trump is driving around in his new red Tesla listening to "Stranglehold" (by Ted Nugent) turned up loud. He's trying to sing along but doesn't know the words, so it's a lot of mumbling between an emphatic "Baby!"
A robotic voice cuts into song: "Warning: low battery, charge soon."
Trump sighs, sees warning on dash screen, and says "Not good. Not happy!" He looks around outside, ponders a moment, and punches a preset phone number on the screen.
Phone rings, Elon Musk answers: "Donald, mein furhrer, what's up?"
Trump: "Not funny, Elon. I got the low battery warning on my car, wondering what to do."
Musk: "Where are you?"
Trump: "Not sure, just driving around DC."
Musk: "Okay, I'm checking your coordinates…Ah, you are not far, come over to my place and you can charge up here."
Trump: "How do I get there?"
Musk: "I'll send directions to your car. It will drive you here. Just sit back and relax."
Trump: "Thank you." Turns music back up and continues rocking.
[fade and cut to his arrival at Musk Mansion]
Car pulls up, stops, and Trump exits. A servant takes car to get it charged. Musk comes out to greet him. They exchange pleasantries. Musk explains that it will take a couple hours for car to get charged.
Trump is disappointed: "Much too long…not happy!"
On a nearby expanse of lawn they spot two archers. Musk explains, "Joe Rogan and Ted Nugent came over to shoot arrows." They walk over. Rogan and Nugent are dressed in camo, muscle shirts, baggy pants, bush hats, etc. They have large, sophisticated compound bows, and are enjoying a friendly competition. They are shooting well, hitting in and around the bullseye, and whooping it up.
All stop and greet.
Trump says to Nugent: "You know, I was just listening to 'Sledgehammer' on my way over."
Nugent: "That's not my song."
Trump: "Oh, I think it is."
Rogan: "No, dude, that's Peter Gabriel." Tries singing a little, "I wanna be…your sledgehammer."
Nugent: "Gabriel's a communist pussy!"
Rogan amuses himself by affecting a British accent: "E's a woke bloke."
Trump frowns: "The radical woke left strikes again! This is why they must be deported."
Nugent: "No, man, he's a British fag."
Trump: "Hiding behind a flag, even that of a respected ally, won't keep us from finding all the radical left Marxists who are ruining this beautiful beautiful country. We will root them out and deport them."
Rogan and Nugent look at one another and shrug.
Servants arrive and pass out cigars and whiskey. Musk tries to lighten the mood by explaining Trump's predicament. Rogan suggests they all go bow hunting while waiting for his car to charge. Trump and Musk seem reticent. Nugent and Rogan urge Musk and Trump to try their hand at their bows. Musk is terribly spastic, and Trump's hands are too small to manipulate the bow and arrow. Neither succeed.
Rogan produces a couple small, child-sized crossbows for Trump and Musk to use. They both manage to fire an arrow off. Trump talks about how fast and far his arrow went, and how accurate his aim was. Trump and Musk start getting into it, firing off arrows. Competing.
RFK Jr, shirtless and well muscled, with corked face and headband, a la Rambo, comes crawling out of the bushes with a large hunting knife gripped in his teeth. Removes knife, "I heard something about a hunting expedition and thought I'd come along." Kennedy is in great shape but also puts off a slightly feral vibe. He's a little scary.
Rogan explains: "We don't have any more hunting gear for you to use."
Kennedy: "That's okay, my knife will be enough. I can run anything down and slit its throat."
Trump, listening to Kennedy with fascination, absently loosens the red necktie from his collar and secures it around his head as a headband.
Rogan goes around applying blackface to everyone.
Musk announces that he will drive everyone in his Cybertruck to hunting ground.
Nugent calls "Shotgun!" Musk tells the other three they must ride in truck bed.
Trump: "Didn't know about shotgun rule…not fair…don't like it!"
Nugent stares him down.
Trump, Kennedy, and Rogan all trudge up truck ramp and lay down in bed. Gear (compound bows, crossbows, arrows, etc.) is laid down amongst them. Nugent warns them to not harm his bow. They cross their arms across their chests, looking like three vampires going to sleep.
Musk slowly closes the retractable top over them, while Trump complains: "Getting dark…crowded and uncomfortable…very stinky!"
They take off in Cybertruck. Nugent and Musk, in the front seat, have difficulty conversing. Not much in common. Musk turns on sound system and "Con te Partiro" (by Andrea Bocelli) is playing. Musk nervously looks over at Nugent, who listens a moment, then breaks into a big grin and says, "Oh, man, I love this tune!" Musk is relieved.
Banging and muffled yelling is coming from closed rear compartment but Musk and Nugent don't hear. They are enjoying the song and begin singing along. Nugent is really belting it out, singing surprisingly well.
Robotic voice cuts into song: "Warning: low battery, charge soon."
Nugent curses.
Musk nervously checks dash and locates nearest charging station, pulls in, and begins charging Cybertruck. Musk then retracts the back cover and the three payload passengers (Trump, Rogan & Kennedy) rise up and walk stiffly down the ramp, blinking at the sunlight. Musk explains it will take a couple hours to charge up. All groan.
Trump complains of hunger. Rogan produces a bag of homemade elk jerky. Kennedy & Nugent pounce on bag and consume it before Trump and Musk have a chance to get any.
Trump: "Getting very hungry now…not happy!"
Camera pulls back and we see the charging station is located in a Chuck E Cheese parking lot. Rogan offers to buy pizza for everyone while they wait. They agree and file inside, children staring at the strange-looking crew entering. Musk becomes transfixed by the Chuck E Cheese animatronic band playing "Everybody Wants To Rule The World" (Tears for Fears).
[Fade out]
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