Short winter days bumming you out? Try Daylight Stretching Time (DST), the newest, grooviest way to beat the darkness.
Say you live near the latitude of Seattle, where December sunrise/sunset is roughly 8am/4pm. That 8am sunrise is okay but that 4pm sunset is totally bumming us out, right? Wouldn't you rather the sun set at 8pm instead? Well, Daylight Stretching to the rescue!
Here's how it works: your proprietary DST timepiece will run 50% faster during the day to squeeze in those extra 4 hours. Instant 8pm sunset! (You're welcome, you deserve it!) Simple. Genius. And don't worry about tomorrow because your DST clock will automatically slow its roll (50% again) through the night so you get that super-sweet 8am sunrise the next day (and the next, and the next).
It's all super complicated, what with different latitudes and seasons, but the scientists and engineers at DST Labs have totally figured it out. And here's the beauty part: Daylight Stretching is totally flexible. You can have whatever sunrise/sunset you want, all year long! Just punch in your desired times and let Daylight Stretching do the rest.
Daylight Saving is so yesterday, start Daylight Stretching today.
(Mike Kalantarian)
Hilarious!
Exactly the mentality of all the time-change schemes. Trying to fool ourselves about something, instead of just changing our own behavior (for instance, getting up earlier) to adapt to natural realities.
The last change in November messed me up when I changed my actual time I went to sleep. So I learned, and this time changed the hour’s name, kept to my “real time,” and it’s going well. (ie, instead of going to sleep at 9:30 I go now at 10:30. I know, you with no rules just do whatever you want, whenever you want, but I suddenly have all these rules, c’est la vie and asi es…)