Off The Record

ALL THE RECENT fires in Lake and Mendocino County have been fully contained, CalFire has reported.

MISSING PERSONS Kathy LaMadrid and David Neily will be featured Friday afternoon (21st September) 1pm in Mendocino at the Presbyterian Church, 1pm, on the national road tour called “On the Road to Remember,” an awareness campaign that primarily focuses on missing person cases that have gone cold or have not received appropriate media coverage on the local level — much less the national level. The tour, which travels through many states annually, provides that attention. Call Monica Caison: 910-232-1687 for information.

A LENGTHY PRESS RELEASE from MTA boasts of the agency's new website. Boiled down, you can now go on-line to find out when the bus will never come. If you came in late, the Mendocino Transit Authority runs heavily subsidized, lightly patronized “public buses at hours inconvenient to working people to and from inconvenient destinations.

THIS NOT-SO-SUBTLE racism is plastered on the sides of San Francisco buses in the form of a large advertisement: “In any war between the civilized man and the savage, support the civilized man. Support Israel. Defeat Jihad.” Most people are not going to note the distinction between most Muslims and Jihadis, but the obvious point of the thing is to paint all Muslims with the Jihadi brush while, of course, ignoring the ongoing crimes against Palestinians committed every day by the Israelis.

A WOMAN'S HUSBAND has been sick. He's been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, but she's been staying by his bedside every single day. When he wakes up, he motions for her to come nearer. She comes over, sits next to him. His voice is weak. He holds her hand. “You know what?” he says. “You've been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business went sour, you were there. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. You know what?” “What, dear?” she asks gently. “I think you bring me bad luck.”

IF CRANK KILLED Deputy Dog, imagine what it does to you, Mr. and Ms. Tweeker. Morgan, the 15-month-old German shepherd from the Czech Republic, only began his career with the Sheriff's Department on February 12th. Trained to sniff out drugs, the dog bit into a bag of crank during a recent training exercise and subsequently died from ingesting enough of it to kill him.

A READER identifying herself as “An Old Bag,” passes along this observation: “Yeah, my grandmother was born in England in 1888 and had to leave school at age twelve to go work in a hemp factory. Not what I would want for my twelve year old granddaughter. But it will likely be the fate of YOUR twelve-year-old great-granddaughter. My mother, born in Liverpool in 1923, left school at the equivalent of our eighth grade to work in a shop to help support her family. Was it any wonder that so many English girls were willing to trade England for life in America as war brides? Mom thought she had died and gone to heaven when she arrived here in 1947. I still remember her packing boxes full of candy and other luxuries to send to her family back home. We (the collective we of this special and highly limited era) have enjoyed a brief period of untold prosperity built on the back of cheap hydrocarbons. In less than a century we went from ten-year-olds working 12-hour days, six days a week, in the woolen factories of New England to fourth-graders complaining because their teacher took away their iPhone so they couldn't coordinate their piano lessons with their tennis coach. They'll be back in the factories in less than a century.”

LAST FRIDAY NIGHT (September 14th) about 10pm, Mendocino County Sheriff's Deputies cruising North State Street, Ukiah, stopped a vehicle driven by Christopher Eichiner, 26, of Fortuna. Deputies made the stop “for minor traffic violations.” Eichiner was found to be driving on a suspended license, and deputies discovered marijuana and more than $90,000 in cash “hidden in snack boxes in the trunk of the vehicle.” In other words, this guy, with $90 grand in the trunk of his car, was extremely careless. When the DA gets the report of Eichiner's arrest he will smile because Eichiner will undoubtedly forfeit the cash in return for, basically, a minor misdemeanor conviction under the DA's lucrative policy that allows defendants in pot cases to give up the money if they agree to save the taxpayers a lot of money by not going to court. The confiscated dough? It goes to support Mendo law enforcement. The Fortuna man is being held on $20,000 bail at the County Jail where he must kick himself to sleep every night.

IN A LENGTHY tribute to himself appearing in last Wednesday's Ukiah Daily Journal, and undoubtedly written by his office staff, Congressman Mike Thompson again trots out his old lie: “When Thompson left school he joined the Army and went to Vietnam where he served in combat with the US Army as a staff sergeant and platoon leader. Wounded, he was shocked when the ambulance bus he was on was rocked by protesters when he arrived in San Francisco at Letterman Army Hospital.”

NEVER HAPPENED. Millions of Americans opposed the Vietnam War, all of them making the obvious distinction that the people forced to fight it were also its victims. But here's this demagogue claiming people were attacking wounded veterans. The only demonstrations I remember having anything to do with soldiers at the Presidio occurred at the gates in support of soldiers who refused to go to Vietnam. (My friend Fred Gardner wrote a very good book about them called “The Unlawful Concert.”) No one ever “rocked” an “ambulance bus” anywhere in the United States.

IN OTHER VERSIONS of this shameful (and sinister) lie, Thompson said he was spit at. That never happened either, a fact you can confirm for yourself in an excellent book called “The Spitting Image — Myth, Memory and the Legacy of Vietnam” by Jerry Lembke, in which Lembke is unable to confirm a single instance of a returning veteran being spat on.

I SUPPOSE Thompson keeps telling his Vietnam-era lies about how protesters spit on him and assaulted ambulances to bully public opinion into supporting the wars in the Middle East and our preposterous military budget. He's been a consistent vote for all these disasters.

THIS LATEST REVISION of Thompson's old lie is buried in another lie, that this so-called “tribute” to Thompson is some kind of spontaneous celebration of his all-round wonderfulness. It's not. It's a fundraiser for him, and if you want to join the “tribute” to Mike it'll cost you $45.

ROBERT PARKER, Deputy Director of Transportation, addressed the Supes last week on behalf of “Rediscover Freedom,” making it clear that he was speaking on his own time. (As a top County bureaucrat, Parker can come and go as he pleases, so what's the diff?) But Parker was all about explaining the obvious, that County roads are deteriorating and that the eventual cost of repair will be greater than keeping up with routine maintenance. Parker occasionally addresses the Board, and whenever he does, he says he's talking on behalf of “Rediscover Freedom.” Thinking it was another far right fringe group we tapped in the key words and sure enough, there it was - “Rediscover Freedom” - the campaign website of Robert V. (Bob) Parker, write in candidate for Assembly in 2006 against Patty Berg.”

“REDISCOVER FREEDOM,” as it turns out, is a fringe group of one. There have been no updates or additional postings since the original one where Mr. Parker announced his quixotic write in campaign against Berg where he explains: “I'm entering the race at the 'eleventh hour.' However, it was only quite recently that events occurred which caused me to leave the ranks of the “Silent Majority.” Parker does not say what those events were. Perhaps he had just learned that Patty Berg, (like every state and federal representative for the Northcoast for the last several decades), was selected by a small group of self-anointed Democratic Party insiders that don't think like he does. And what does Mr. Parker think?

ACCORDING TO THE WEBSITE, “The 'Rediscover Freedom' campaign platform - which offers a political agenda that critically differs from that of Ms. Berg - has four legs: 1) Support our Troops; 2) Return to our traditional values; 3) Require open and honest government; 4) Achieve campaign finance reform. Support our troops and God bless America. Sincerely, Robert V. (Bob) Parker.” Here in Mendoland, where history starts fresh every morning, you can also create an “organization” that reflects your personal point of view and then speak on behalf of it any time you like.

SUPERVISOR PINCHES later noted the large infusion of federal dollars into the County road system that came about as part of the federal stimulus program and an earlier state proposition, making the somewhat questionable claim that County roads are in good shape compared to earlier years. Pinches also praised (deservedly in our opinion) the County road crews, saying they get a lot done with the resources available.

FORT BRAGG POLICE were summoned to a home in the 200 block of North Harold Street at 3:50am last Saturday night (September 8) when a 16-year-old boy reported that a man, soon identified as Daniel Alonso, had entered his home through the unlocked front door and grabbed the boy's genitals while he slept on the couch. Alonso ran from the home when the boy woke up, picked up a hammer and chased Alonso onto Harold Street where the boy lost sight of him. Alonso was arrested at his home on Sunday morning and charged with sexual battery on a minor and burglary. He is being held in the Mendocino County Jail on $100,000 bail.

THE ALONSO EPISODE occurred the day after the FBPD did a perv check on the town's registered sex offenders, of whom there are the startling number of 20, all men, most elderly. All of them were in apparent compliance with the registration laws.

ACCORDING to the Board of Supervisors' recently approved budget, their “Major Accomplishments” for last year included: “In coordination with the Executive Office, the Board of Supervisors held several priority setting workshops throughout the year that informally established a framework for priorities in the context of an extremely limited fiscal environment. The Board was actively engaged in legislative advocacy efforts and policy development, utilizing Executive Office and departmental staff to proactively address issues at the State and federal level of government. The Board pursued a policy of full cost recovery on fees for County services. In addition, the Board was a catalyst for various efficiency efforts in County government from consolidation of County buildings to new agreements with labor units the Board authorized several cost reduction policies to adjust to the new revenue reality. The Board assured services are delivered that meet: public safety, health, social, cultural, education, transportation, economic, and environmental needs of our communities. The Board conducted regular meetings, special work sessions, joint policy sessions with local officials, and select evening and off site meetings throughout the County in Fiscal Year 2010/2011 in response to constituent interest and policy developments. The Board endeavored to maintain a responsive and responsible government to sustain the quality of life of the people of Mendocino County while responsibly addressing unprecedented fiscal challenges facing the organization and the residents of Mendocino County.”

THIS SOUNDS LIKE a lot of blah-blah. Which it is. In fact, the Supervisors are doing pretty well at running the County, managing to meet our basic civic needs with less and less money. That's their major accomplishment, and it's a large one.

THE FRESH BUDGET for 2012-2013 begins, by the way, almost $3 mil in the black. On paper. In theory.

ACCORDING TO THE DA’s on-line statistics, in 2011, there were 15 jury trials, six of them for drunk driving. 11 of these trials resulted in guilty verdicts, two persons found not guilty. Two trials ended in hung juries. So far in 2012 there have been 13 jury trials, five of them drunk driving cases, all of which have resulted in guilty verdicts.

DA EYSTER listed the following “Major Accomplishments” in 2011: “The District Attorney carried a full caseload and appeared in court on cases, while also handling the day-to-day management of the office. The District Attorney prosecuted a Three Strikes case that resulted in the imposition of a sentence of 25 years to life, the longest sentence imposed on any defendant in calendar year 2011. With an increased focus on the prosecution of serious and violent offenders, was successful in removing 105 local felony offenders to state prison in calendar year 2011. For January 1, 2012 through May 8, 2012, an additional 35 local felony offenders have been removed to state prison. Decreased the average time it takes to litigate a marijuana-related case in the local courts to approximately 90 days, from approximately 15 months in the year 2010. This decrease has resulted in significant budget savings across the board to all stakeholders in the local criminal justice system. Employing an under-utilized statute promoted by Senator Barry Keene and that became law 29 years ago, the District Attorney collected over $500,000 in marijuana-related restitution in calendar year 2011 for local financially-strapped law enforcement agencies. For January 1, 2012, through May 14, 2012, restitution of $320,964. The jury trial conviction rate for calendar year 2011 rose to 82%, in comparison to the conviction rate of 71% achieved in calendar year 2010. For calendar year 2012, 15 out of 16 defendants have been found guilty, with the one case being a hung jury. Decreased operational spending. For example, using a five-year average of expenses as a benchmark, the DA’s Office has experienced a 5% decrease in overall office expenses from that five-year average. Other budget accounts have experienced up to a 56% decrease over the same average. Reinvigorated a misdemeanor educational diversion program to divert from the criminal justice system first-time, low level offenders at the pre-file stage. District Attorney testified before Assembly committees in calendar year 2011 on proposed modifications to the Health and Safety Code. Deputy District Attorneys were active in coaching mock trial competitors, speaking at the Reality Check program, as well as the Every 15 Minutes program to educate local high school students about the dangers of driving under the influence. Asset forfeiture monies have been donated to the Youth Project (counseling and teen drug court programs), an increased Sober Grad Night effort county-wide, and supporting anti- drug messaging through local sports programming. With the hiring of a Public Information Officer, news releases and media access have been increased so that the public is generally better aware of the progress of cases and other noteworthy news. Revised the office’s procedures and practices. District Attorney has generally undertaken all charging decisions, resulting in consistency and fairness in the filing process. Increased the marijuana conviction rate from 56% to 81%, and recovered over $500,000 in restitution to the Mendocino County Sheriff’s Office. Reduced the number of new cases filed in the courts by filing only violations of probation, as well as relying on state parole to punish violators through parole proceedings. Prosecutors continued to work closely with the Victim/Witness Advocates and with the victims of crime to ensure victim needs are met. Information on filing statistics, asset forfeiture numbers, and other information is now available online. The District Attorney’s website www.co.mendocino.ca.us/da features, among other things, statistics of cases submitted for review. The website also includes asset forfeiture statistics, information on the various divisions and bureaus, news releases, a link to the Check Enforcement Program, Victim Witness information and other frequently requested information. Much of this information was not available in prior years, but is now available because the District Attorney is requiring a new level of transparency.”

THE NUMBER OF MURDERS in Mendocino County in 2011, totaled 10. Two of the homicides were the two victims of Aaron Bassler — Matt Coleman and Jere Melo. If those two were taken out of the statistics, the 2011 murder count would have been eight which was also reached in 2003, 2005, 2008 and 2009. Since Susan Keegan’s death was only recently revised as “homicide,” it’s safe to say that the actual number of homicides in 2011 was 11, not 10.

FIVE HATE CRIMES were referred to the DA in 2011, one rejected, three eventually not charged as hate crimes. There was one conviction but not a conviction on the hate part of the allegation.

MENDO DA Eyster is challenging as misleading local newspaper and radio marijuana-related advertising by an Upper Lake doctor. Milan L. Hopkins, 67, has been placing advertising in local newspapers and purchasing radio spots offering to clear up the “confusion and misinformation” being spread by “newspapers and law enforcement.” Of particular concern to DA Eyster is Hopkins primary claim that his recommendations will protect people in any county from prosecution under state law for 99 plants and 19 pounds of processed cannabis, a claim that Eyster suggests is nothing more than bad legal advice. DA Eyster states it is currently the informal policy of prosecutors in Mendocino County to give no weight to a Hopkins recommendation, a policy that has been shared with all law enforcement agencies in Mendocino County. This informal policy is because DA Eyster has yet to have a Hopkins recommendation come across his desk that recommends an amount of marijuana less than 19 pounds and 99 marijuana plants to any single patient. “What are the odds that every patient this man sees ends up with the same boilerplate diagnosis of needing what we normally would consider commercial quantities of marijuana,” asked Eyster rhetorically. Eyster also noted that the California Medical Board publicly accused Hopkins in April of gross negligence in connection with dispensing medical marijuana recommendations. It's the third time since 1979 that the medical board has taken action against Hopkins, and the state board is yet again seeking revocation or suspension of Hopkins' medical license. Hopkins has denied the medical board charges. DA Eyster says any boilerplate recommendation, including those issued by Hopkins at either of his Lake County offices, is a disservice to patients with legitimate medical needs. “Let me be clear — Doc Hop’s claim that his recommendations will protect individuals from prosecution is a risky exaggeration,” said Eyster. “What Hopkins’ advertising blitz overlooks are the critical issues of how to stay out of court, how to properly and legally document one’s medical needs, and how to go about doing this in such a way that when the police show up at the front door nobody goes to jail,” said Eyster. Boilerplate recommendations are a “waste of time and money, and more likely than not will disappoint big time when push comes to shove,” concluded the DA.

UNFORTUNATELY FOR EVERYONE but the Mendocino County judges continually lobbying for a new County Courthouse, it seems that the new “facility” has been taken off the Maybe-Never list and put back on the Probable-Likely list.

WHY IS THE AVA OPPOSED? The old Courthouse is perfectly serviceable and is also essential to what's left of central Ukiah's mercantile viability. We also understand, and this is unconfirmed at this point, that the new Courthouse will not be anywhere near large enough to contain all the functions of the courts presently housed in the old Courthouse. Which means, and this is also pure speculation, that a handful of wealthy people have bought, or will buy, land surrounding the site of the proposed Courthouse, build office space on them, and lease back this private office space at the usual usurious rates to all the offices presently housed in the old Courthouse. (The new Courthouse will either be two long blocks south of the present Courthouse or about a mile northeast.)

WHAT WILL THE THING look like? Despite a lot of rah-rah about “award-winning architects” — there being no person over the age of 18 left in this country who couldn't be described as “award-winning” — the new Courthouse will be a very large eyesore along the design lines of the now abandoned Willits Courthouse. Count on that. And we're talking a very large public structure, an anchor building for Ukiah and the rest of Mendocino County that we'll all be using and looking at for years. It should be an architectural masterpiece, not a neo-totalitarian eyesore like the one foisted off on Willits.

ASSEMBLYMAN JARED HUFFMAN has long claimed he was once a member of the USA Volleyball Team of 1987. He wasn't, and Huffman, already anointed as our next Congressman, says it's all “petty politics” that his fudging of his sports history from a quarter century ago is being brought up just to embarrass him. Huffman, however, has now made the true record of his sports prowess much clearer, as in, “Like I wasn't exactly on the team but I worked out with them a lot.”

VICE PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE RYAN claimed as a 20-year-old he ran a marathon in just over three hours, a very good time for anyone of any age. (Ahem. The editor of this fine and much beloved newspaper managed to finish three marathons in just under four hours, which isn't too bad given my advanced age at the time.) A 20-year-old ought to be able to cover the 26 miles in under four hours, but Ryan not only couldn't do it, he lied about his time in the one marathon he attempted.

WHAT DO YOU CALL a guy who knows forty-eight ways of making love but doesn't know any girls? A consultant.

THE BUFFALO FIELD CAMPAIGN is based in West Yellowstone, Montana, and works to protect the last free-ranging wild herd of Buffalo in the United States. These bison fled to the Yellowstone area in the 1800's to escape the mass slaughter that nearly wiped out their species. Sadly, these animals are still subject to harassment, quarantine, and even slaughter at the behest of Montana livestock interests. The Buffalo Field Campaign West Coast Road Show comes to the Mendocino Community Center, 998 School St., Mendocino on Thursday September 27 at 7:00. Music provided by local singer/ songwriter Chris Skyhawk and Native American singer Goodshield Aguilar, and stories to bring back the wild buffalo from activist Mike Mease. Admission is sliding scale $5-$25, please come and show your support for these iconic animals. — Chris Skyhawk, hawkwork@mcn.org

PERTINENT COMMENT OF THE DAY from Elliot Sperber: “As its anniversary is celebrated, we will no doubt be reminded that no matter what else it achieved, or failed to, Occupy Wall Street managed to introduce if not a new sensitivity of inequality to the world, it at least introduced a new phrase into popular political parlance. Indeed, the slogan ‘We Are the 99%’ concisely articulates the fact that a deep, structural conflict exists between the so-called 1%, who own virtually the entire planet, and the 99%, who spend their lives in the service of that 1%. And though in actuality power is distributed in more complicated ways than the phrase suggests, and an elite far smaller than 1% calls the shots worldwide, with the willing complicity of much of the 99%, 99-to-1 sums up the point well enough. Because of this, the phrase has resonated strongly throughout not only the US, but around the world. With such ingrained inequalities in place, a society with democratic pretenses utterly fails to live up to the ideals on which the legitimacy of its representative government rests.”

UNKIND comment of the day from Anon: “Hayfork. A thousand people, three last names.”

FRISCO NOTE: The naked guys on grotesque daily display at Castro and Market have become a tourist attraction but a bummer (sic) for most residents of the area. Exhibitionism, of course, is now a constant of urban life, but fat guys walking around naked, neon doo-dads dangling from their saggy puds, and permanently camped in the parklet at Castro and Market, is now almost universally regarded as over the line in the town where over the line began and has been nurtured since 1967.

THE NAKED GUYS can be credited with one achievement — some unintentionally hilarious discussion at the SF Board of Supervisors, one of whom, Scott Wiener, who represents the Castro, suggested that the Naked Guys at least be required to place towels beneath them before they plop themselves down. But even Weiner now wants the Naked Guys gone.

THE NAKED GUYS, predictably, claim they represent a frontier of free speech and a glorious protest against prudery. (I say this country needs MORE prudery, not less. And a return to personal reticence while we're at it.)

QUICK ILLUSTRATION: This old lady I knew, older than I am now, and I'm old, tottered in to visit one day towing an even older gaffer. “This is my lover, Johnny,” she announced, a most unseemly glint in her eye, as she gestured at the old guy, who looked like he'd need a Cialis IV going round the clock to even remind him what he was supposed to do. I didn't need to know the precise nature of that relationship, did I? But anymore people, often total strangers, blurt out confidences best not confided. The fact that the old boy was with her was sufficient for me to understand that she was, as they say in Therapy Land, “in a relationship,” someone to share a toothbrush with. Now that The Boomers are coming on-line — millions of narcissists in human wave attacks for the next decade — we'll hear even more we'd rather not.

WE SPENT A FEW MINUTES wondering what would happen if the Naked Guys began to appear, say, in Ukiah's Alex Thomas Plaza. The Mendocino Environment Center would co-demonstrate in support, the Board of Supervisors would vote 3-2 against public nudity, the Democratic Central Committee of Mendocino County would remain neutral “on the issue.” (America's major pervs are almost all Republicans, a fact confirmed by years of restroom hijinks by Republican congressmen.)

JOSE GRIJALBA, 20, AND JOSE PERALTA, 19, were arrested by Fort Bragg police last Wednesday because police believe the pair jumped out of their car and attacked and beat an 11-year-old boy and an 18-year-old during what police assumed was a gang-related attack. The attack occurred the previous Monday in the 400 block of North Franklin Street.

JERRY BROWN has signed legislation which should reduce the more unreasonably burdensome regulatory and liability costs for the timber industry. Assembly Bill 1492 limits the liability that private land owners bear for fires that spread from their land to public lands, creates a funding source to offset regulatory costs and lengthens timelines for timber harvest plans. AB 1492 was introduced by the Budget Committee, which includes North Coast Assemblymen Wes Chesbro, D-Arcata, and Jared Huffman, D-San Rafael.

FINAL BUDGET HEARINGS for 2012-13 were held Monday and Tuesday of last week with the Board of Supes unanimously approving the budget as recommended by their CEO's office. Unlike previous budget hearings, there were very few questions and very little discussion.

MONDAY'S BUDGET SESSION of the Board of Supervisors meeting focused on Criminal Justice Realignment — the Governor's plan to keep non-violent, non-serious, and non-sex offenders in the local criminal justice system instead of packing them off to overcrowded state prisons for graduate studies in advanced criminality. AB 109, which mandated the shift from state to local responsibility, requires each county to set up a Community Corrections Partnership (CCP) to approve a plan for spending state realignment funds.

INITIAL FUNDING comes from a portion of the state sales tax and vehicle license fees, but there is no guarantee of funding beyond this fiscal year. Unless, that is, the voters approve Governor Brown's tax plan, Proposition 30, which is supposed to guarantee funding for criminal justice realignment, plus provide enough money to prevent further cuts to social services and education. If Prop 30 fails, it will trigger large cuts to education. The underlying message of Prop 30, a masterful exercise in political cynicism, is “Vote yes or we kill your baby.”

PROP 30 increases taxes on those making $250,000 or more annually. It has been dubbed “tax the rich,” but it also raises the sales tax, which hits everyone. A competing measure, Prop 38, was funded by Molly Munger, the daughter of the billionaire partner of Warren Buffet. Prop 38 (which should be called “tax everyone”) hikes the income tax on anybody making $7,316 or more. Ms. Munger, who likely was raised on stories about the unfair treatment suffered by billionaires, believes everyone should pay to support education (whether they can afford it or not, apparently). Competing tax measures increases the odds that neither will pass. Ms. Munger, who resisted fierce pressure from the Guv to drop her ballot measure, is said to be interested in running for statewide office (a Democratic Meg Whitman, if you will). Prop 38 is projected to be her springboard to electoral relevance.

FOLLOWING PRESENTATIONS on Monday by members of the local CCP, including Chief Probation Officer Jim Brown, Sheriff Allman, DA Eyster, Public Defender Thompson, Superior Court Judge Ann Moorman, and Health and Human Services Agency (HHSA) Director Stacey Cryer, the Board of Supes approved the recommended spending plan. The state is kicking down over $2.8 million for the current fiscal year but what happens next year is a big question mark if Prop. 30 goes down the drain.

MOST OF THE MONEY for realignment goes for new hires, including six correctional officers for the jail at a cost of $758,252. Except it looks like the jailers will now be called “Community Corrections Counselors.” Five probation officers and a half-time probation office staffer will be hired at a cost of $546,470; as well as a half-time eligibility worker for HHSA at $34,000; a half-time alcohol and other drugs counselor at $53,706; and a “Mental Health Rehabilitation Specialist” for $98,000. Also included is a $360,000 contract with an outfit called "BI" to operate a “day reporting center.” Over $800,000 of the $2.8 million is being held in reserve “for unanticipated expenses.” The reserve is short-term protection against having to use general fund money to pay for this new state mandated program.

PREVIOUS BUDGET HEARINGS have sometimes turned contentious with the department heads, the CEO and the Board of Supervisors squabbling over how to divide an increasingly slender slice of general fund revenue. Tuesday's final budget hearing was expected to be more of the same. Supervisor Kendall Smith, forever stuck in Blue Meanie Mode, is always looking for a way to take the Sheriff down a notch. Back in May the Board directed that $700,000 in funds raised for the Sheriff by DA Eyster’s “restitution” plan, which some people call extortion but is essentially a clever means of putting confiscated dope cash to public benefit, be put in a reserve for the Sheriff's Office. The Board also directed that $1.4 million that would normally be transferred to the Department of Transportation (DOT) Road Fund be used instead to pay off County debt. Smith was counting on Supervisor Hamburg, (also a Blue Meanie guy), and Supervisor Pinches (who probably regards the cops as simply mean given the special attention his family gets from them and who has more miles of County road in his district than anyone, to be able to shift money from the Sheriff and split it between roads and social services. But it never happened. In fact, Smith never even tried, at least not in open session, the only time it would have counted.

ASSISTANT CEO KYLE KNOPP, the Executive Office budget watchdog, made the budget presentation, starting with a recap of recent years which featured multi-million dollar deficits, layoffs, wage cuts and depletion of the reserves. But just as Knopp started to review the budget recommendations for individual departments, Supervisor Pinches said he supported the budget as presented. And that was it. Kendall Smith had lost her potential third vote in terms of being able to pry any money out of the Sheriff's budget. Knopp proceeded to discuss the recommendations, mostly minor adjustments, except for another $250,000 to the DA and a like amount to the Sheriff. Other than a few questions about the Sheriff's budget by Hamburg, that was it. Smith seemed largely disinterested in the process, fiddling with her County issued “Blackberry” most of the meeting. After a scant two hour hearing, the budget passed unanimously.

THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE apparently overestimated the amount of revenue to be received from zip ties and Eyster's “restitution” program, resulting in a shortfall of over $300,000. The Sheriff agreed to trim the amount down to $250,000 and requested additional general fund money to close the gap. And the Executive Office agreed. The DA's budget has gone from $4.2 million in 2008-09 to $3.2 million last year. Critics say Eyster's swift resolution of marijuana cases means he doesn't need more money, but Eyster responds that resolving the marijuana cases has allowed his office to devote additional resources to serious crimes, including the ten homicides committed in Mendocino County last year.

ALISON GLASSEY, the former long time Social Services Director, who was later moved into the Executive Office (where she functioned as hatchet man for CEOs John Ball, Al Beltrami and Tom Mitchell) was exiled into the County Museum in Willits when Carmel Angelo took over as CEO. Other than the Sheriff and DA, who responded to a few questions, Glassey was the only department head to address the Board to plead for more funding. By all accounts, Glassey has done a great job breathing new life into the Museum. But the Museum is not a money maker and has lots of unmet needs. The curator was let go last year. There is no one to properly catalogue and manage the collection. The roof leaks. What was supposed to be museum quality storage, to preserve the artifacts, turned out to be unusable for that purpose. The Supervisors were unmoved. Finally, Glassey asked for a pittance, the $4,794 in the museum budget that didn't get spent last year. But only Smith came to her support, and to no avail. (Here in Amnesia County where history starts all over again every morning and everyone is whatever he says he is, an historical archive has almost no public support.)

SUPERVISOR SMITH also sought, again without success, to add a couple of thousand dollars to help maintain a gage on the Noyo River that measures water flow. The gage mainly benefits the City of Fort Bragg which pumps water from the Noyo, but can only do so if certain flow levels are maintained. The County eliminated funding for that and several other gages after former Water Agency Director Roland Sanford submitted a budget inflated with grant money that was never applied for or received. Sanford was shown the door and the remaining Water Agency functions were carefully scrutinized to bring the budget back in line.

AUDITOR/CONTROLLER MEREDITH FORD put in a cameo appearance to review actual revenue for last fiscal year and projected revenue for 2012-13. Revenue last fiscal year was $2 million more than the budgeted amount, but over a million came from one time revenues for extension of the solid waste franchise, sale of surplus property and a boost in tobacco tax revenue. Property tax was flat, but sales tax and bed taxes saw modest increases. The final closeout for 2011-12 showed a surplus of $2.7 million, which was promptly rolled into the current fiscal year to help pay for increased retirement and healthcare costs, which consume an ever larger share of the County's so-called discretionary revenue. Which really isn't discretionary, since the retirement and healthcare costs have to be paid.

THE COUNTY decided a couple of years ago that across-the-board wage cuts were necessary to balance the budget. The County, just like the state, had a classic structural deficit, with built in costs consistently exceeding available revenue. But unlike the state, the County took drastic action, in the form of layoffs and wage cuts, to correct the imbalance. In 2009-10 the County had a $3.5 million dollar deficit. In 2010-11 the County managed to pass a precariously balanced budget by implementing the first of the wage cuts and by taking the last $1.9 million from the reserve fund.

THE COUNTY BARGAINING UNITS, especially SEIU, which represents the majority of the County workforce, naturally don't like wage cuts but no one has come up with a better way to balance the budget, as us chickens out here marvel at Mental Health hires at $90,000-plus. SEIU was the last holdout, finally agreeing to a 10% wage cut earlier this year, but not before the inept union leadership bungled the employees into an unnecessary 12.5% cut. The County also consolidated the workforce into County owned buildings, saving $1 million in annual lease payments to private parties, and implemented other cost cutting measures, but it is largely because of the wage cuts that the County was able to balance its budget and put $2.7 million back into reserves in fiscal year 2011-12. And bottom line for 2012-13 is that the County is adding another $1.5 million for a total of $4.2 million in reserves.

SEIU, LARGELY MISSING IN ACTION when the Supes are discussing the budget or other issues that SEIU says are important to them, finally showed up. Dave Eberly, one of the bargaining team members, told the Board that the 10% wage cut had created a “labor quality of service crisis.” Eberly painted a grim picture of trained employees departing in droves, increased workloads, high stress levels, increased waiting times for people seeking benefits, all leading up to “an environment ripe for public backlash.” He asked the Supervisors to take a long range look at budget issues so that employees were not affected with short term funding swings. Which is the whole point of holding the line on spending, (including the just adopted wage cuts), and building up the reserve fund.

CARL CARR, SEIU field representative, apparently flushed out by a recent mention in this column noting his long-term absence, showed up to complain that SEIU had not had enough time to review the budget and demanded that the County “meet and confer” on the budget issue. (Jesus H. Keeerist! Sure, Carl. How about if we bring the whole show over to your house for you?) Supervisor McCowen, Chair of the Board, tried to coax an answer out of Interim County Counsel Terry Gross that meet and confer was not a budget issue, but Gross seemed unsure. Supervisor Pinches stated clearly that the budget process is not a meet and confer issue. Which it isn't. In the face of such obvious grandstanding, you have to wonder: is SEIU that dumb, or do they think their members are? (Answer: Both. SEIU is incompetent and the membership is clearly content to go on paying union dues to people who don't know or even seem to care about what they're doing.)

THE RECOMMENDED BUDGET was published a month ago, which should be plenty of time for the largest labor union in the whole goddam world to brush up on the numbers. And if the locals can't grasp what the numbers mean (and clearly they can't) they can refer the budget out to someone who can. If, that is, they really want to know what the County's financial condition is.

THE COUNTY BUDGET ADDS about $1.5 million to the reserves for this fiscal year, but that figure is misleading. Projected revenue for the current fiscal year, despite hoped for modest increases in property, sales and bed taxes, is less than actual revenue from four years ago. And for each of the last four years the budget has taken multi-million dollar hits for increased retirement and health care costs. And the only reason the County is able to put money into reserves is because it reduced by an equal amount the General Fund transfer to the Road Fund. So the roads will further unravel as the County continues to teeter on the financial edge. And only SEIU is still asking if we really have a budget problem.