Bird’s Eye View: Happy Thanksgiving

by Turkey Vulture, November 23, 2011

Greetings. if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin. A Happy Thanksgiving to one and all for tomorrow’s big event! What a great day! “Well done!” to whoever thought of it. This Mother-of-All national holidays, and by far my personal favorite, is all about celebrating with friends and family. Throw in food, drink, and football and it surely can’t get much better than that!

Anyway, as you digest that unnecessary yet unavoidable second helping of food tomorrow, and before your nap, perhaps you will be inclined to summon up the energy to take part in my Thanksgiving Day Quiz. Answers at the end of the column.

1. How many people were aboard the Mayflower when it set sail from England in 1620? a) 35 b) 88 c) 102 d) 148 e) 715

2. One year after the pilgrims had arrived at Plymouth Rock half of them had died. So, as they sat down to the first Thanksgiving, what would you say was the ration of men to women at that historical event? a) Even b) 2:1 c) 5:1 d) 9:1

3. What color was ‘taboo’ to the new settlers and was never worn?

a) Red b) Purple c) Blue d) Black e) Brown & Gold

4. What was the last name of the Mayflower’s Captain?

a) Smith b) Brown c) Jones d) Bligh e) Pardini

5. Which two teams in the NFL traditionally play at home on every Thanksgiving — one since 1934, the other since the 70’s?

6. How many degrees can a Turkey see with its eyes?

a) 360 b) 270 c) 180 d) 90

7. What is America’s favorite dessert on Thanksgiving?

a) Pumpkin Pie b) Pecan Pie c) Sweet Potato Pie d) Crème Brule

8. At the first Thanksgiving which of the following was approved table manners? a) To eat with your hands b) To spit on the floor, c) To throw bones into the fire when done d) All of these

9. Who pushed for the Turkey to be the nation’s national symbol?
a) Benjamin Franklin b) Abraham Lincoln c) FDR. d) George W. Bush

10. Fish, fowl, peas, pumpkins, veal, beef, turkey. Which of these items was not on the very 1st Thanksgiving Day menu?

11. True or False? Indians attended the first Thanksgiving feast.

12. True or False? Thanksgiving is always the last Thursday of November.

13. True or False? Male Turkeys are the ones who make the gobbling sound.

14. True or False? The Pilgrims bought beer with them on the voyage to the New World.

15. True or False? At the early Thanksgivings, Turkey Vultures were also on the menu.

Staying with the “Thanksgiving” theme for the Quote of the Week, I have a few words from Matt Groening, creator of ‘The Simpsons’, to perhaps remember when all of the family is gathered together on the big day — “Families are all about love overcoming emotional torture.” Hey, it could have been worse. I was going to share Joseph Stalin’s comment about gratitude which is a feeling we should all perhaps have on this special day. He said “gratitude is a sickness suffered by dogs” — what a miserable bastard; I shall not be inviting him or his ilk over tomorrow! OK, let’s have a positive thought to finish with — and with the Thanksgiving Day Dinner the focal point for most of us, what better sentiments than those uttered by English novelist and essayist, Virginia Woolf, who very wisely pointed out, “One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.” Who could possibly argue with that?!

Public Service Announcements. Calendars and pens at the ready. #100. Thanksgiving tomorrow — just to remind the less alert amongst my readership. #101. The annual Holiday Bazaar sponsored by the AV Unity Club is next weekend, Saturday Dec 3rd at the Apple Hall in Boonville from 10am to 4pm. More details next week. And that’s it — apparently a week dominated by Thanksgiving and not much else.

Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge — “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley.

…The 3-Dot was a little quiet last Saturday evening as several regulars decided to take a road trip out to Elk and ‘Bobby Beacon’s’ bar there — up on a hill overlooking the small town and the ocean beyond. It is owned and run by the Elk Fire Chief of that name and with his generous drinks and the bar’s friendly atmosphere, it is no wonder that this very out-of-the-way location is popular — even the Valley’s Bloyd Family — Amy, Eric, and Mea — make it their regular Saturday night haunt!

…The recent ‘Occupy Hendy Woods’ event was a success according to both those involved and those who attended. Up next, as the community and others try to keep this special place open to one and all, will be a short film and discussion on this very important topic at the 2012 AV Film Festival in January.

…The regulars who stayed in town came to the almost unanimous decision that for bar snacks it is very difficult to do better than Lauren’s fries and The Buckhorn’s chicken wings. No argument here.

…A few other customers decided to by-pass the road-trip to the coast, and both the bar snack discussion in the 3-Dot and the Hendy Woods event, to travel down to Rincon Valley just northeast of Santa Rosa, to watch the #2-seeded A.V. High School girls compete in their postseason Volleyball final against the #1 RV Christians. And they must be so delighted they did. In what was apparently one of the most amazing games in this program’s long, storied, and very successful history, the Lady Panthers came out on top in a five-set thriller 25-19, 17-25, 25-23, 23-25, 16-14 to clinch their second successive post season title. Many congratulations to the players and Coach ‘Flick’ McDonald.

Well, why not finish on that very high note, I say? I’m outtahere. Remember to Keep the Faith; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you. One final request, “Let us prey.” Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture. PS. Contact me with words of support/abuse through the Letters Page or at PS. Hi, Silver Swan.

Happy Thanksgiving!

PPS. Quiz Answers: 1. Answer c). 102 — 74 males, 28 females. (2 dogs, no Turkey Vultures). 2. Answer d). With only fifty-one survivors, the ration of men to women was 9:1 — there were just five women remaining! I couldn’t possibly comment further. 3. Answer b). Purple. It was associated with wealth and the upper classes in the Old World at that time. 4. Answer c). Jones. His name was Christopher Jones 5. The Detroit Lions (since 1934) and the Dallas Cowboys play at home on this day every year, which for the hapless fans of the Lions, in recent years anyway, has generally meant a miserable Thanksgiving. 6. Answer b). A Turkey can see for 270 degrees around it. This would explain why you’ve had little luck when trying to creep up and capture a wild one for dinner. I suggest you just buy one from Lemons’ Market! 7. Answer a). Pumpkin Pie, although Freshly Squished Squirrel Pie covered in a creamy entrails sauce is the pie of choice here at The Nest. 8. Answer d). All were acceptable — similar to Thanksgiving at The Nest where guests are encouraged to partake in each of these. 9. Answer a). Benjamin Franklin — a great man and obviously a true visionary. 10. Beef. Not even bulls’ testicles or cow eyes. Too bad... 11. True. The Indians easily outnumbered the Pilgrims, more than half of whom had died over that first year. 12. False. It’s always the 4th Thursday of November, even when November has five Thursdays. 13. True. Females do not. 14. True. Yer gotta like that. 15. False. That would be unacceptable, although possibly quite tasty.

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