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Posts published by “Zack Anderson”

Sideline At The ‘Stick

Sunday an hour before kick-off, Niners vs Seattle, I’m on the sideline behind the Seahawk bench. A few players for both teams are on the field, running practice routes, playing soft toss, punting balls high…

A Holiday Quiz

Dear Dr. Zack: The holiday season breaks like a campaign promise upon the diamond-encrusted hull of the S.S. Reality. Now comes word that the Democrats will suspend the minority’s right to a Congressional filibuster. See…

The Golden State Of Dreams

Cynics may decry sport as the ultimate mass opiate, but as a friend puts it, “They should try smoking ten bowls of Chem-Dog x Jack Herer while watching Golden State in the fourth quarter.”

Diary Of A Numb 49er Fan

It’s Friday afternoon. An unseasonal sun bakes the city with a gratifying if alarming tropical malaise. Tiny birds sing in the trees. There’s a case of frozen corn dogs in the freezer and half a…

Grunting & Punting

The first bad sign is Tuesday before the game. Speaking before a tangle of sweaty flesh and Japanese electronics plastered with the corporate logos of “news outlets” 49er receiver Randy Moss says: “Now that I'm…

The Correct Handling Of Contradictions Among The People

Sunday morning I wake up and it’s still dark outside. The clock says 5:17, which means it’s already past eight in New Orleans. If Patrick Willis is up, then so am I. Wait, is Louisiana…

The Curious Case Of The Missing Baseball Pennant

The phone rings. I pick up. “Zack, this is The Goob.” The Goob, aka Daniel Johnston, is my fellow AV Panther from the old days. We were on the baseball team in the 1982-83 school…

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