The Mother Of All Toothaches

A Penny for your thoughts.

— Dr. Swift

* * *

She had a toothache the size of Mount Rushmore. It was so bad she needed more than Novocaine, Xylocaine, more than nitrous oxide … more like 28 grams of cocaine and some “crack,” a mix of coke and crank.

Bail was originally set in the case against Jacki Lyn Scott for $150,000 by Judge Cindee Mayfield, the same judge who'd arraigned defendant Scott back in July when she was caught with enough coke to put a jolt of verve in every dolt in the county.

The details of this bust are, predictably, Top Secret because the scuttlebutt is that Ms. Scott has been supplying the North Coast Bar Association with coke and other feel-good meds for years — a kind of errand girl for rhythm, the kind of up-tempo rhythm only crank and coke can set.

I am what they call “new to the country” — a flash in the pan, here today and gone tomorrow. So I don’t know, but my sources assure me that this was no ordinary bust.

But even as a newbie, I know and you know, dear reader, that Judge Jonathan Lehan had a nose for coke. Plus, he had a weakness for the bottle — eight DUIs, count ‘em! — while he was a sitting judge, and he often recused himself from hearing DUI cases for this reason. Was he the only one? Not very likely, is it?

Back to the coke.

There is hardly a lawyer in the world who hasn’t sampled cocaine. I defy you to show me one — especially in this region. In point of fact, back in the 80s when our presently sitting judges were all lawyers and law students, they were the main market of the coke importers and dealers (see Whiteout by Alex Cockburn and Jeffery St. Clair, if you think I’m exaggerating).

By way of disclaimer I should point out that whenever I sniffed coke, it was always at some legal beagle’s expense; so it might seem like I’m biting the hand that fed me. However, indulge me my point: Lawyers and cocaine were, back in the 80s, practically synonymous.

An email from the DA’s Press Liaison Mike Geniella sent me on this goose chase in a snowstorm, as it were. I went to the Clerk’s office and asked to see the file. It was the only time in my brief, silly life I have ever been asked to produce a Press Card.

“Crimeny,” I griped. “Thinking, you let me see murderers’ files without a how-do-you-do, yet this case requires an ID! …” My dog tag was promptly surrendered and snapped to some confidential materials the Clerk removed from the file (stamped “Not For Public Record”) and, if I am not mistaken, a timer was ignited because a subtle light started pulsing and the cameras in the smoky glass pimple on the ceiling started whirring.

You have to wonder.

Attorney Justin Petersen was retained by defendant Scott and he held a bail hearing right away. That was back in July, a few days after her arrest on the 17th. Bail was reduced to $50k and Mr. Petersen got his client out of jail.

How bad was Jackie Lyn's

toothache?

“Justin Petersen appearing for Jacki Lyn Scott, your honor, who is unable to be here because of a dental surgery emergency. When my client gets out of surgery, she hopes to enroll in a residential treatment facility where, the prosecution has agreed, she will do her jail time day-for-day.”

Judge John Behnke asked Deputy DA Ray Killion if that was a fair and accurate representation of the deal, and Mr. Killion agreed it was. The less said the better, brevity being a virtue and all.

Twenty-eight point five grams (one ounce) of snow would blow the entire Nor Cal Bar Association’s collective nose away for a whole year, not to mention the 57 grams of “a substance containing cocaine” and another 57 grams of “a substance containing methamphetamine.” Count Five alleges possession of marijuana for sale; Count Six alleges cultivation of marijuana; the amounts are not mentioned in the file — at least, not in the part of the file I was allowed to examine. Counts One through Four had to do with the possession and transportation of the white powders. Other than that, the case is being settled behind the legal curtain; a progress report on the Grandmother Of All Toothaches has been set for September 14th.