Bird’s Eye View (April 5, 2017)

by Turkey Vulture, April 5, 2017

First, “Evening Dining in the Valley.” Finally! Two restaurant openings are virtually upon us, both in the space of less than a week. Aquarelle Cafe and Wine Bar will re-open this Friday April 7, with a new menu and new hours. (To be confirmed next week.) The new menu includes a Santa Maria-style bbq outside, serving half-chickens, ribs, tacos, along with beers and sangria. I hope to be on those half-chickens really soon. Down the street, after a six month absence, the Buckhorn’s re-opening is here: Wednesday, April 12! The Valley returns to being a civilized place, with half chickens and sangria served and a bar serving draft beers, and appropriate food, plus margaritas, samosas, Martinis, and Jameson’s Irish whiskey, etc.

Of course, there are six other nighttime eateries in the Valley. Lauren’s Restaurant continues with their lunches on Thursday-Sunday, 11.30am-2.30pm, and dinner Tuesday-Saturday, 5-9pm. Lizbby’s, the new Mexican Restaurant in Boonville, is open every day except Tuesdays, serving breakfast (on Saturday and Sunday) and lunch from 10am-3pm and dinner from 5-8pm. The Boonville Hotel continues with their family-style, prix fixe menu served Friday-Sunday. The Redwood Drive-In just keeps on doing what they do. Stone and Embers is open Noon to 8pm Friday-Sunday and Noon to 4pm on Monday and Tuesday. The Bewildered Pig! is open Wednesday-Sunday, 5:30-9pm. Eat, drink, and be merry.

“The Buckhorn, AV” will finally open next week under new owners, Jean and Tom Condon, daughter Jordana Condon, and Chris Cole (these latter two being recently employed at Lauren’s Restaurant as waitress and cook respectively. Chris previously worked as a waiter/bartender at The Buckhorn under prior owner, Tom Towey). Small business owners have had to persevere and fight through the red tape and bureaucracy of Mendocino County the last few months to open a pub/restaurant. One would like to think the local government would try to help such endeavors instead of seemingly doing their best to prevent such small businesses opening and being successful. But, now that the bastards have finally been beaten down, a new and much anticipated establishment will open and provide the community with something it has needed for six months.

Quote of the Week: British social commentator and writer, Samuel Johnson (1709-1784): “Nothing has been yet contrived by man, by which so much happiness is produced as by a good tavern or inn.”

Public Service Announcements. #543. For the month of April, a Diabetes Workshop will be offered by the AV Health Center at the Senior Center on Tuesdays in Spanish from 10am-Noon and on Thursdays in English from 1-3pm. To register please call 707-895-3477. #544. The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital visit  twice this month at the AV Farm Supply on Highway 128, north of Philo. Thursdays April 13 and 20, from 2-3.30pm. New customers and their pets are always welcome. Previous visitors can call 462-8833 and the vets will bring your pet’s charts with them! #545. The Boonville Farmers Market continues Winter location and hours at The Boonville General Store, Saturdays 11am-1pm. For more info, call Cindy at 895-2949. #546. Need a burn permit? From 11am-3pm on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Fridays you can get one from the Firehouse in Boonville. Call 895-2020 for more information or stop by. #547. The The Unity Club’s AV Lending Library is open Tuesdays from 1.30-4.30pm and Saturdays 2-4pm at The Fairgrounds in Boonville. #548. The County Dump is open from 9am-4pm Tuesday, Wednesday, Saturday, and Sunday. Dump Executive Director, Mike Mannix, rewards good customers with a star but will be very harsh with anyone thinking they can leave dead animals! #549. The AV Grange Second Sunday Pancake Breakfast is April 9 from 8:30-11am. Prices range from $5-10. kids through hungry folks, for a delicious, locally-sourced breakfast. Pancakes (gluten free available but gluten extra not), eggs, and bacon, with a choice of juice, tea or coffee included. #550. “Preparation for the Rest of Our Lives” meets at 4pm at Lauren’s Restaurant on Sunday, April 9. This important but often avoided topic deals with the options available to all of us at some point. #551. The Yorkville Master Shepherd tells me that the first local sheepdog trial of the year is Saturday, April 15, at The Fairgrounds in Boonville. The “Spring Trial” — a fascinating battle featuring Man and Dog versus the Ornery Sheep — starts at 10am.

Here is the menu for the Community lunches and dinners over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors for both lunches and dinners and $7 for Non-seniors for lunch and $8 for dinner. Tomorrow, Thursday, April 6, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Chicken Tamale Loaf with Birthday Cupcakes for dessert. Next Tuesday, April 11, the evening meal at 6pm features Chicken Cordon Bleu Casserole followed by Not Mama's Banana Pudding for dessert. Second Tuesday of the month, so the dinner will be followed by Bingo at 7pm. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal! Linda Boudoures and Karen DeFalco host the new and exciting “Young at Heart Exercise” with Tai Chi every Tuesday at 11am on Tuesday and Thursday from 9-9.45am. Thursdays at 11am-Noon is Kathy’s Easy-stretch Yoga class. Also Thursdays, the Active Life Club from 10am to 2pm features games, crafts, and music. The Senior Center/Community Bus goes to Ukiah on Mondays and Santa Rosa on the first Wednesday. Best to sign up early at 489-1175. ALL ages welcome.

From Three-Dot Lounge regular, The Old Buzzard, comes the follies of the “Leader of the Free World (?), aka: “Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching.” — “The Trump Thing,” or as it had been known for almost 250 years up until now. The US Presidency. A court is expected to approve payments to 3,700 former students of Trump University today. The man who is now president set the business up to sell (in true used car salesman style) courses to those eager to prosper in the property business. The company offered a free introductory seminar. Teachers were then encouraged to sell them courses starting with the “one-year apprenticeship” ($1,495) and going all the way up to the Gold Elite course ($35,000). Ads for the company boasted that Donald Trump handpicked the teachers. In a subsequent deposition, he could not remember meeting any of them. The students sued. The Trump organization said it would not settle. Then it did. “While we have no doubt that Trump University would have prevailed at trial based on the merits of this case,” it said in a statement, the resolution would allow Mr. Trump “to devote his full attention to the important issues facing our great nation.” Is there no end to this man’s boorish actions and compete lack of class? Please pass the sick bag.”

Thanks Buzzard. I’m outtahere; gotta see a man about a sheep. So please take me drunk, I’m home. Be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of ditches; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets, remember to keep your windows cracked if you leave them in your vehicle; think good thoughts; Keep the Faith; try to not let life get in the way of living; may your god go with you, and may your dog go with you too. A final request, Let us prey. Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture. still wallowing in the honor of having the second tallest tree (343.6 feet) in Hendy Woods named after me and my ilk. Contact me through the Letters Page or at turkeyvulture9@gmail.com. PS. Missing the Venerable Pheasant. Keep on humming, Hummingbird. On the sheep, Grace.

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