Bird’s Eye View

by Turkey Vulture, April 7, 2010

Greetings one and all. If you are sitting comforta­bly then I shall begin. Aaagghh! Having looked for­ward all week to buying some goodies at the Bake Sale held last Saturday morning at Lemons Philo Market, I completely forgot to go. Curses! Never mind, I’m sure a generous and kind-hearted soul out there can drop off a little something (Huckleberry Pie preferably) for a hungry Turkey Vulture at the usual address: The Nest, Anderson Valley. I would suggest dropping it off at the AVA office but, knowing the characters that lurk thereabouts, it would be very unlikely if the pie were to make it beyond the grubby, clasping hands of such unscrupulous people.

Meanwhile, with regards to my obviously poor short-term memory, as a very appropriate Quote of the Week here’s a few words of wisdom from Ameri­can novelist and essayist, Joan Didion, “We forget all too soon the things we thought we could never for­get.” And my particular all-time favorite on this sub­ject from the wonderfully funny mind of Groucho Marx who said, “I never forget a face, but I’ll make an exception in your case.” Certainly a line I like to use as often as possible on my travels.

On to this week’s Public Service Announcements. #216: A friendly reminder that the AV Museum — “The Best Little Museum in the West” — located at the Little Red Schoolhouse Building on Hwy 128 by the Elementary School is open every Friday and week­ends from 1pm to 4pm. Remember, the history of Anderson Valley is full of fascinating stories, artifacts, and true heroes, great and small, all worth your visit. #217: There will be Winemakers Dinner a week from today (April 14th) at The Boonville Hotel to benefit the AV Housing Association. It starts at 6:30pm and will cost you $125 for your dinner and wine. For those who have some disposable income and the inclination to enjoy some of the fineries of life it is a fair price by all accounts, particularly given the cause. Contact Sheila at 895-3525 for further information. #218: Recently I have been remiss in not mentioning one of my favorite weekly events here in the Valley: a County Dump visit! You can drop off trash and recycling up there a mile or so out of Boonville on Mountain View Road on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and weekends from 9am to 4pm. Remember, No Dead Animals, so please leave those to me and my buddies, nature’s finest gar­bage collectors.

Now for some topics under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge: “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley.

…Regulars at The 3-Dot inform me that the sale of the AV Brewery has finally gone through and the new ownership is installed with promises to the staff that all will remain the same; hopefully not another exam­ple of empty corporate promises. Does this mean that ‘King’ Ken Allen has departed these parts? Not yet, I’m told, as apparently he is to be an ‘employee’ for the next four months during the transition period, during which time the annual Boonville Beer Festival will take place (May 8th). Perhaps now we peasants will go to the Brewery Visitor Center without fear of retribution and be greeted by the even richer ‘Deposed King’ before sitting down to enjoy a conciliatory pint or two with the old bugger! I’ll have a pint of Poleeko Gold, please, Ken. Obviously you’re buying.

…A little bird turned up at the Lounge and informed us that starting in May there will be a Bingo Evening at the Veterans Building in Boonville that will continue to be held on the second Tuesday of every month thereafter. These fun evenings will not only have prizes for the winners but will also benefit the Senior Center and you are encouraged to attend the special dinner served prior to the evening’s activities. More details to follow, although I can tell you the first session will be Tuesday, May 11th. Please mark it on your calendar.

…Due to unforeseen circumstances (torrential rain/hangover) I was unable to attend the Sunday morning Pancake Breakfast/Easter Egg Hunt put on at the Apple Hall and Fairgrounds in Boonville by the Lions Club to benefit the AV Teen Center. However, Hummingbird was on hand at the event and swung by The 3-Dot to let us know that despite the atrocious weather there was a good crowd and the Lions themselves were out in force, working hard to ensure it all went well. Many thanks to all these volunteer Lions: Judy Long, Olie Ericksen, Candy and Ed Slotte, Derek Wyant, Nicole Johnson, Joanie Clark, Willie Housley, Patty Liddy, Kevin Lee, Frank Wyant, and Bob Sites. (The rumor that Bob did more eating than cooking cannot be confirmed.)

Finally this week, I should inform you that I did show up at The Grange for the Dan Hamburg campaign fundraiser (Mendocino 5th District Supervisor) featuring up-and-coming comedian Mo Mandel. I should add at this point that I am unable to endorse any of the four Candidates as Turkey Vultures are still not allowed to vote in this county. Ridiculous, I know. Regardless, it was a good Show by Mo, a Boonville boy born out of the loins of Benna Kolinsky and Danny Mandelbaum, two people who feature prominently in their boy’s act, somewhat to their consternation I would imagine, although they are currently vacationing in China and can temporarily avoid any embarrassing ‘repercussions’ until their return! I have been to hundreds of comedy shows over the years, mainly in San Francisco, and can declare that Mo is good; he may well go very far in fact. His act is certainly not aimed at the kids and it was refreshing to be able to have an adult evening in town — finally! I sometimes think the whole Valley social scene is based around shows for/by the kids (not that there is anything wrong with that on occasions of course) and wonder whatever happened to an evening of adult discussion/humor/banter without interruption from ‘the little people.’ May be it’s just me. But I digress. Anyway, Mo’s humor was caustic, contemporary, and cutting-edge; the audience responded well; the Hamburg camp would have been pleased with the turnout; and if only the lovely and vivacious bartender had not poured me such large servings of beer then I would have made it to the Pancake breakfast!

Time to take my leave. Be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you. One final request: “Let us prey.” Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture. PS. Contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at turkeyvulture1@earthlink.net.

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