Bird’s Eye View (Jan 6, 2016)

Greetings one and all. Are you are sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin. How are your New Year’s Resolutions coming along? Surely better than mine, which were all out the window, in tatters, by late on Sunday, January 3rd. But, we must carry on and what better place to start than with this week’s Public Service Announcements?

#544. The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital will be visiting the Valley on two Thursdays this month. January 14 and 21 at the Anderson Valley Farm Supply on Highway 128, north of Philo from 2-3.30pm. #545. The Mendocino Bookmobile returns to the Valley on Tuesday, January 12. They are here on alternate Tuesdays for 45 minutes at each of these places and times: Navarro Store 9am (for just 30 minutes before heading out to Comptche); the Floodgate 12.30pm; Philo 1.30pm; Boonville (Apple Hall) 2.30pm. Phone 463-4694 for further details. #546. There will be no Barn Sales at The Big Barn on AV Way for the next couple of months as those involved in organizing the monthly event take a winter break to organize the Crab Feed (see below) and other events. #547. My research so far has led me to discover that the next visit to the Valley by the Mendocino County Haz-Mat vehicle will not be until March 26! Of course trying to confirm with the County “government” that such a visit is really that far in the future has proven to be far from easy, but I am working on it. #548. The AV Museum is open every Saturday and Sunday, from 1-4pm in The Little Red Schoolhouse next to the Elementary School on AV Way, a perfect thing to do in the Valley when you have a couple of hours spare on a weekend afternoon at “The Best Little Museum in the West.” #549. The AV Grange is having its regular second Sunday Pancake Breakfast on Jan 9 from 8:30-11am. Prices from $5-10 (kids through hungry folks) for a delicious, locally-sourced breakfast. Choices include pancakes (gluten free available), eggs, and bacon; choice of juice, tea or coffee included.

Here is the menu for the Community lunches and dinners next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans Building in Boonville. $6 donation from seniors for both lunches and dinners and $7 for Non-seniors for lunches and $8 for the dinners. Tomorrow, Thursday, January 7, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be a Sausage Skillet and Noodles with Wendy's Oatmeal Bar for dessert. Then, next Tuesday evening, January 12 at 6pm, the dinner will feature Tamale Loaf and Better Cake for dessert. As this is the 2nd Tuesday of the month, the dinner will be followed by Bingo at 7pm. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal. it maybe the best $7 you’ll spend all week! Hopefully you will be able to attend, and remember. ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there.

Topics and Valley events at The Three-Dot Lounge— “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley.

…Latest update from Crab Feed Central. Tickets for perhaps our most community-centric event of the year, The “Original” Crab Feed to benefit the Catholic Church on Saturday, February 6, are now on sale. They are priced at $45 each and there will be just 300 available. They will sell out. To buy yours, call either Gloria Ross at 895-3071 or John Schultz at 895-9552.

…With our local eateries and stores operating under somewhat confusing hours of operation at this time of year, you can be sure that the Pic ‘n’ Pay in the heart of Boonville will be open just about whenever you need it to be. Those guys saved the day with that pound of butter on Christmas morning. Crucial for the creamy mashed potatoes! Meanwhile, as always, I encourage you to “support your local businesses. You’d miss them if they weren’t there,” and always consider the mantra that “eating out is fun!.”

…School is back in session and, being aware of the many distractions confronting high school kids these days, I can only hope that they put a concerted effort into their studies over the important coming months. Come on, boys and girls, give it your all, particularly you seniors. You know it makes sense. I may be an old fart but I am right. Trust me, you can thank me later.

…While we’re talking about school, how about the curriculum featuring a class entitled “Life in the Real World 101” at the high school, a sort of combination of what used to be called “civics” (the rights and duties of citizens) and social skills? In my experience, most of the students could certainly use some pointers in the right direction with regard to these areas.

…From our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, comes another in his insightful series. “Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching.” Buzzard reports, “I propose that no more winery tasting rooms are opened anytime soon. The wine in the Valley is obviously very good and I enjoy it as much as anyone, but don’t we have enough places to try it at this point? Enough already! Particularly if any new ones were to be simply ego-wineries, owned by those who assume they can make wine just because he/she has made their millions in an entirely different expertise, somewhere else. And certainly not if they continue to reside in some far flung location, have never lived here, rarely visit, install gaudy gated enclaves, and wouldn’t know a wild hog if it bit them in the ass or a Turkey Vulture if it defecated on their head. “…I’m outtahere and, after that little rant, I should probably escort the Old Buzzard out too. Besides we’ve got see a man about a sheep. So, “please take me drunk, I’m home.” Until we talk again, Keep the Faith; be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets; and may your god go with you. Oh, and of course, a final request: “Let us prey.” Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture.

Oh, before I go, I was wondering whether you knew that we Turkey Vultures are not mere meat-guzzling carnivores; we like our “veggies”? Yes, folks, a recent study of almost 400 of my brethren’s pellets collected in the Castro Valley and Livermore areas in California showed that plant material was the single most common ingredient of the Turkey Vulture's diet. The material consisted primarily of grass and leaves. However, before we go all vegan/vegetarian on you, I am proud to announce that there were plenty of animal food items in the pellets. These included: shrew, mole, squirrel, gopher, mouse, rat, rabbit, bird, reptile, insect, muskrat, opossum, raccoon, skunk, badger, sheep, and coyote. Impressive, eh? Particularly when you consider that if not consumed and sterilized by my relatives and me, these carcasses would have rotted on the ground and could have spread disease. We truly are nature’s garbage collectors and it’s not always as glamorous as you may think. (Contact me through the Letters Page or at turkeyvulture9@gmail.com. PS. Keep on humming, Hummingbird. Missing the Venerable Pheasant everyday. On the sheep, Grace.)